Bad Relationships: Should we worry?

[X-press]

Yellow Sapphire brought up, during a debate in another thread, a problem which probably exists everywhere including in Oman: forbidden relationships.

Do you agree that it is an actual problem here and should we personally be scared of the repercussion of this in the future?

[QUOTE]Originally posted by yellow sapphire
i am getting scared the future are not only bad but too mad.who wants his sister to get f **.who wants,the answer no one,they know the problem but they are not doing anything.at the end zina will be spread every where.

[X-press]

While waiting for other members to answer, could you Yellow Sapphire tell us more about this issue?

Do you really believe that girls (in Oman) are "fooling" or as you seem to say "sleeping aroung"? What girls are you referring to?

If that is true, why aren't the family of these girls doing something to stop it?

Waiting to hear opinion from the members.

[Orion]

Hmmm... I've been shocked how things have changed in Oman over the last few years.

Now-a-days it's impossible to keep an eye on your young ones.

But we must not lay blame on girls alone, after all, it takes two to tango. These 'girls' can only do bad things if boys are there with them doing the bad things. So the question is...

How do we teach children about the limits in our society... how can we teach boys that our country is special...

[yellow sapphire]

why our mothers and sisters come home from wedding at 1 and 2 very early in the morning.why they do not make wedding in the after noon and women come home at 9 o'clock.

[Arabian Princess]

YS,
I dont think the problem is in weddings, the problem is on how we treat the girl herself.

I beleive it all starts with how much you pay attention to your kids when they are small. Attention does not mean to love and provide all thier needs, attentoin should also include direction.

Yes, there are girls who do not respect our culture and who do interfer in a relationship that if forbiden not only in our culture but in Islam itself. But, as x-press asks, where are the parents???? do you know where is your daughter going?? do you see what is she watching at your own home???? do you fullfil her curiosity to know all about boys and even girls?

Parents in Oman generally rarly have those frank talks with thier daughter. I think it is basicly the culture itself but taht is wrong. Talk to your daughter and son. Try to know what is going in thier mind and try to fix what is wrong.

It is not an easy job ofcourse, but at least you should try!!!

[Seniora]

it seems that yellow saphire should be the last person to be asked about this. this is beacouse all his posts reflect on how narrow minded he can be sometimes,and will never even consider that the men have a part in what is happening, he is busy trying to put back the restricitions women had in teh 18th century, no way is that going to happen:)

i admit that things arent the same in the arab gulf as it had been once. there is more freedom and some youngsters are misusing it, and orion is right, we should look for ways to teach our "children" ( both sexes).

i think the first step is to install religion and faith into the child, as welll as modesty, dignity and self respect into the children.

[amo0or]

All things are based on trust, if u give the trust to your children they almost will use it in the right way.
If the family really care about their daughter and son, as some of you said the family should give them attentoin. why dont we talk with their kids??? why dont we give them some attention?? why is that?? why dont we give them a limited freedom just to win them and win their love and their trust..
in my opinion..its all depend on parent ..how do they treat their children.

[Shahrazad]

Childhood is always considered as the critical time in which whatever input the parents offer the child will carry throughout his life, starting from language to religion and so on.

However, there are excpetions and we can't always blame the parents.
Friends play a role and they are what you call a two-edged swrod. They either build or destroy. So the input is not concentrated on the parents and only the parents but on friends, surroundings....etc.

Orion brought up a very vital question, How do we teach children about the limits in our society?!

Oman is turning into a different stage, this new coming generation is something totally different. Let's just pray for Oman to stay safe.

[Neena]

Couldn;t have said it better, i guess all whats is really needed to be said the group members have.

But just to add a lil more, i do agree that no matter how much it actually all starts from parents on how they teach their kids, but parents are not the only inviduals to blame here. There are so many things that are distructing the new generation now.

Technology plays as well a huge big role. A good example is Internet.... you could see whatever u want to see till you drope died... no one will stop you. Another thing.. T'V... Movies things they see there could as well affect on the way the youngster think. Majority of the young ones these days get very easily influenced but what they see from movies,, from the western culture.. you can;t blame them.

However, at the end... parents should never get tired from advicing their kids. its always good being very open and straight forward with kids, show them whats good and bad... don;t hide things from them they would rather know things from you than from a different source should would lead them to even bad or worse thinking.