I know we have had threads about women and Islam but what about men as far as if they "get out of line" with their wives what is the consequence. What checks and balances are in place to guide a husband to be a good Muslim and good man towards his wife and family? I just read more about what is in for the woman than the man and wanted clarifications.

Thanks

This is all I got about rights of women in Islamic marriages: Link (http://www.iica.org/?q=node/24)

However, if talking to him fails, I reckon she can ask one of the elders of his family (or hers) to talk to him about it and if it does not work, then perhaps divorce is what she seeks and that can be achieved through court.

However, reading this is interesting:

The interviewer asked the cleric if the wife can discipline the husband when he strays. "Can she too take a ruler, beat him and reprimand him, if he, for example strays. Is there equality in this?" Good question. Islamic answer:

"No, we give leadership to the man. She can also refrain from intimacy with him. Just like he can leave her bed, she can leave his. There is a parallel here."

Though I am not sure it is a reliable source (http://www.truthandgrace.com/muslimwomen.htm)

Thanks Lym. I always want to know what Muslim women think in regards to these issues. I am only an outsider looking in and love to see all viewpoints from those who are Muslima and married.

Unfortunately I'm not a Muslima nor am I married :p
However, I think one of the best internet sources to head to is IslamOnline.net.
They often have good answers from reliable scholars.
An interesting extract from their answer on 'The Status of Woman in Islam' is:
Equality and sameness are two quite different things. This difference is understandable because man and woman are not identical but they are created equals. With this distinction in mind, There is no problem. It is almost impossible to find even two identical men or women.
Then it delves into a long list of the rights of woman...The first of which being the right of a man TO a woman:
First man, is the person solely responsible for the complete maintenance of his wife, his family and any other needy relations. It is his duty by Law to assume all financial responsibilities and maintain his dependents adequately. It is also his duty to contribute financially to all good causes in his society. All financial burdens are borne by him alone.
Then to talk further of the rights of the woman within the household as well:
The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, acknowledged this honor when he declared that Paradise is under the feet of the mothers. She is entitled to three-fourths of the son's love and kindness with one-fourth left for their father. As a wife she is entitled to demand of her prospective husband a suitable dowry that will be her own. She is entitled to complete provision and total maintenance by the husband. She does not have to work or share with her husband the family expenses. She is free to retain, after marriage, whatever she possessed before it, and the husband has no right whatsoever to any of her belongings. As a daughter or sister she is entitled to security and provision by the father and brother respectively. That is her privilege. If she wishes to work or be self-supporting and participate in handling the family responsibilities, she is quite free to do so, provided her integrity and honor are safeguarded.
Then is another article called 'Husband and Wife: Mutual Rights and Obligations in Islam'. Again on IslamOnline.net.
An extract on the obligations of the husband here:
Because the Qur'an and the Sunnah of the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, have commanded kindness to women, it is the husband's duty to:
1- Consort with his wife in an equitable and kind manner. Allah Almighty says, "… and consort with them in kindness." (An-Nisa': 19)
2- Have responsibility for the full maintenance of the wife, a duty which he must discharge cheerfully, without reproach, injury, or condescendence. Allah Almighty says: "Let him who hath abundance spend of his abundance, and he whose provision is measured, let him spend of that which Allah hath given him. Allah asketh naught of any soul save that which He hath given it. Allah will vouchsafe, after hardship, ease.‏" (At-Talaq: 7)
Components of Maintenance:
Maintenance entails the wife's incontestable right to lodging, clothing, nourishing, and general care and well-being.
1-The wife's residence must be adequate so as to provide her with the reasonable level of privacy, comfort, and independence. The welfare of the wife and the stability of the marriage should be the ultimate goal.
2-What is true of the residence is true of clothing, food, and general care. The wife has the right to be clothed, fed, and cared for by the husband, in accordance with his means and her style of life. These rights are to be exercised without extravagance or miserliness.
Non-Material Rights:
A husband is commanded by the law of God to:
1- Treat his wife with equity.
2- Respect her feelings, and to show her kindness and consideration.
3- Not to show his wife any aversion or to subject her to suspense or uncertainty.
4- Not to keep his wife with the intention of inflicting harm on her or hindering her freedom.
5- Let her demand freedom from the marital bond, if he has no love or sympathy for her.
There are many beautiful hadiths from the prophet PBUH regarding husband and wife relations and human relations in general. Among them is one which I (as a Muslim) find among the most interesting things the prophet PBUH ever said:
"Allah will not be merciful to those who are not merciful to people." (Saheeh al Bukhari, Vol. 9).
In his Final Sermon (which is, as I've read, the most documented and authenticated hadith), the prophet PBUH says:
"Do treat your women well and be kind to them for they are your partners and committed helpers."
The prophet PBUH also said:
"The best amongst you, are the best for their wives"

I hope that kinda clear things out.

Thanks Threadlike for the references. Will check them out. :)