I was having a discussion with a friend about illegitimate children and I asked her if she met someone who had everything she ever wanted in a partner except that he was illegitimate, would she marry him? Her answer was No, she can't consider someone who is illegitimate for several reasons that she could clarify here.

I, on the other hand, said that I would agree provided substantively he is what I am looking for in a partner (whether my parents would accept him is a different matter all together). My reasoning is that it is not their fault that they're illegitimate and it infuriates me when I see society ill treating them due to the mistakes of others. So yes, if he is a good guy who comes from a good family (if he was fostered as a child) then I will consider him.

What about you?

I would marry her is she was what I wanted since it is not their fault they are like that.
But of course when you do that, thanks to people talking, they will tarnish our families reputations.

I prefer this then being with someone from a good family who treats people like trash and thinks she is the Queen of the world.

you mentioned that providing your parents accept the person, that itself is a whole other story, society in general views them differently and hence parents too. however, being fostered by a good family might get me to consider that person.
so generally no, but in different circumstances i don't know what i would choose to do. I don't personally have anything against illegitimate kids, just that i find it hard to marry.
its a big and confusing issue.

I'd marry him.. it's not his fault after all and he could be waaaay better than others who are legitimate ;)

Like you said, if he's a good person then why not?

Yes, if they are a good person why not. The sin is on the parents not the child.

wait lemme think???? mmhhhh No

There is nothing abnormal here

But people can be weird

I don't think the fact that they're illegitimate would affect their personality in a negative way. They could still be a great person, so I can totally see myself being attracted to someone who happened to be illegitimate but who had the qualities I looked for.

The only problem with this, is that a lot of the time those who are illegitimate in our society are abandoned when born and even if they're adopted, you might not know their true "origins/roots", and in our society, the older generation seems to place a lot of importance on a person's tribe,etc so I can see how they might find a problem with the whole situation. You know how the obsession is with the whole "pure Arab" thing :rolleyes: If a person's origins are unknown, that is very likely to create a problem to some people.

if she is illegitimate, that's cuz wutever was done by her parents which was her parents...whats the problem there in her...? she hasnt done anything wrong then why not?

Well in a choice between being with the woman I love or judging her for daring to come into the world...I'll take the former.

العرق دساس

Lym, translation please

i wouldn't find any problems at all..but i would want him to look up who his father is, wouldn't want to marry someone that was related to me. and if there was any family diseases, i'd wanna know about them before having children, so i can make wise choices and seek treatment.

العرق دساس

Lym, translation please
i done a google translation...

'race blowers'

what do you mean by that?

^ i dont think race blowers shows the meaning well, but in general it means that the son is bound to be like his parents in some way, like parent like child. similarities are bound to occur.

i have no idea..
i know that an illegitimate cannot marry any1 but an illegitimate, its a hadeeth.. so i dont know .. thought its not their fault.. its their parents mistake..

So yes, if he is a good guy who comes from a good family (if he was fostered as a child) then I will consider him.



How would you know that he belongs to a good family if the roots are unknown?

I wouldn't care....guess I'm going to hell then.

How would you know that he belongs to a good family if the roots are unknown?

If he is FOSTERED. As in, if he had a family takes care of him as a child, then that family should be a good family because they are essentially his family even though he is not really from them. So long as they are a good family, then it would be easier to assume that he was raised well.

Nope, I'll pass.

I think ... No, I can't accept. :(

When I am mad at someone, I always go the sentence with: Yaaa bint/ibn el 7alal (O' Child brought in a Halal way) ... imagine one day I get mad and blurt 'Yabn El 7alal' ... aah!

Guys, what if it turned out he/she was illegitimate but you hadn't known it?

By then, it wouldn't make a difference.

Wow. I sound so contradicting