how do u get to know a guy before marrying him or before deciding that yes he is the right person? i know in islam, if Muslims are planning to get married, they are allowed to go out in public to get to know each other. But our cultural doesnt allow that because I am 100% sure the sociaty will look down at a girl who does that. If u go to a place where no body knows u then u r safe but if anyone from relatives/family sees u out then u r in trouble. because they wont take it positively they will staight away label u as
as a bad girl.

I just need someone to enlighten me..whats up with our sociaty??

Society doesn't allow many things that Islam allows. If you play by the book -Islam- why would you care about what people say? Screw society !

as endure said, play by ( islam ) n not relatity n no1 can say antyhing about it, but since when was dating allowed?
sitting with a stranger a lone? that was never allowed!!

When I follow my religion and do what I want my family get upset because SOCIETY talks!
I am not doing anything wrong here!
But society wins these days!

I don't think you can know a person unless you go with him and talk to him I agree on that.
You can always go out with him but take someone else with you..
Forget what society says.
They love to make things hard!

Nosa...am saying in public not alone...

if Muslims are planning to get married, they are allowed to go out in public to get to know each other.

That's only true if you have like your mother/sister/brother or the guys mother/sister/aunt out with you too. It will give you enough time to know each other while you're doing things the right way (you're not breaking islams rules or the "society"). The important thing is that you're not ALONE with the guy unless you're already married to him :p (Duh! hehe)

Society doesn't allow many things that Islam allows. If you play by the book -Islam- why would you care about what people say? Screw society !

Do you mean that in Islam it's allowed for the girl to date a guy alone ? She can take one of her Mahrams with her and talk to the guy if he's interested in marrying her and she feels she wants to get to know him.

Do you mean that in Islam it's allowed for the girl to date a guy alone ? She can take one of her Mahrams with her and talk to the guy if he's interested in marrying her and she feels she wants to get to know him.
so u r saying isnt allowed to see a man in public??? :bored: so u mean like a girl shouldnt leave her parents house without mahram right?

I didn't know Islam allowed that! What I know is if the guy is serious then he could see the girl with a mahram present, he cannot go out with her in public to get to know her.

so u r saying isnt allowed to see a man in public??? :bored: so u mean like a girl shouldnt leave her parents house without mahram right?

No, I mean when it comes to seeing a guy then yes mahram is a must in Islam. There are some circumstances as well like studying in a class with boys and these stuff when there is no other choice.

Do you mean that in Islam it's allowed for the girl to date a guy alone ? She can take one of her Mahrams with her and talk to the guy if he's interested in marrying her and she feels she wants to get to know him.

Yes she can only see the guy if she's with a mahram and that's what I understood from FLORENTYNA when she mentioned in "public".

I didn't know Islam allowed that! What I know is if the guy is serious then he could see the girl with a mahram present, he cannot go out with her in public to get to know her.
Do you mean that in Islam it's allowed for the girl to date a guy alone ? She can take one of her Mahrams with her and talk to the guy if he's interested in marrying her and she feels she wants to get to know him.
i ment these 2 when i said she cnt sit with him alone, coz even in public when a man n women sitting by themselves, its considered ( alone )

i agree with what endure said. if anybody judges 'you' (in general), tell them i only have to give an account to God, and what i'm doing is not forbidden.

What about a chaparon? My mom had that and still married my dad. If an Omani dating couple have chaparones what is wrong with it?

There is no proper dating in oman

how do u get to know a guy before marrying him or before deciding that yes he is the right person? i know in islam, if Muslims are planning to get married, they are allowed to go out in public to get to know each other. But our cultural doesnt allow that because I am 100% sure the sociaty will look down at a girl who does that. If u go to a place where no body knows u then u r safe but if anyone from relatives/family sees u out then u r in trouble. because they wont take it positively they will staight away label u as
as a bad girl.

I just need someone to enlighten me..whats up with our sociaty??

This is the right way of "dating" in terms of culture/islam.

P.S:You need to define what you mean with date exactly.I will be taking it as going out on public or girls house and talk/dinner/lunch/breakfast/coffe...etc

1-The guy states that he like you physically or what he saw of your attitude/action in a certian enviroment.

2-he propose to you.

3-He can take you out as he is your fiance (The phase which you both try to know each other and see if this work or not.Your brother or a "ma7ram" will be without while that.
He always can come to your house and sit and talk to you as well to know each other.

That is not wrong in our socity or cultur.

The wrong is :

1-You go out with a guy without your family knowing about it.
2-there is no relationship between you I.E not your fiance.


Simple isnt it ? :)

What about a chaparon? My mom had that and still married my dad. If an Omani dating couple have chaparones what is wrong with it?


chaparones means ?

mostly Omani people Date inside their cars , " truth " , not because they are scared of god , its because they are scared of what will people say if they saw them. :)

chaparones means ?

A chaparone is someone like a brother, sister, aunt, etc...who accompanies you when you are dating...to make sure no hanky panky goes on and the girl's virtue is protected.

^ That's what we call mahram.

I think it is only wrong if you two go out alone - out of the sight of the public as in to date in cars parked in secluded areas. However, you can "date" if somebody accompanies, so that you two are never alone or the safer option is getting to know each other via phone or Msn (initially) before he officially proposes. Though I think if you guys want to see each other, then group outings is your safest bet. This way the society will not look down on you and no body has to know there is anything between you and that certain guy.

mostly Omani people Date inside their cars , " truth " , not because they are scared of god , its because they are scared of what will people say if they saw them. :)
Exactly this is what I am talking about....u can see how the social pressure have impact on our lives...

Its sad...

Sad to date in secret but I am looking at it from over here across the oceans. What are some elaborate or creative ways Omanis have for dating?

..whats up with our sociaty??


Everything is UP, do not worry :)