I don't understand why is the dowry that significant, since at the end of the day the couple will have to share their financial stuff, and they'll be a married couple :os Makes no sense to me whatsoever, his money is hers and vice-versa.. That's how I see it. :sunsmile:

No I don't share, even if I am married, even if I have kids. I will have my own bank account and he will have his own. However, it is not a bad idea if a portion of my salary and a portion of his salary go to a third joint bank account where the purpose of that account is for our children or any other joint responsibilities. But for the most part, our monies are not mixing because it can have severe implications if anything goes wrong. This does not mean you can't contribute financially to the household.

I know too many women who have been conned by their husbands; husbands who have taken their money and the law does not protect them since it is their money too! So as a precaution, keep it separate. And La samaha Alla (God willingly), you split up, at least the division of the assets will be easier.

No I don't share, even if I am married, even if I have kids. I will have my own bank account and he will have his own. However, it is not a bad idea if a portion of my salary and a portion of his salary go to a third joint bank account where the purpose of that account is for our children or any other joint responsibilities. But for the most part, our monies are not mixing because it can have severe implications if anything goes wrong. This does not mean you can't contribute financially to the household.

I know too many women who have been conned by their husbands; husbands who have taken their money and the law does not protect them since it is their money too! So as a precaution, keep it separate. And La samaha Alla (God willingly), you split up, at least the division of the assets will be easier.
That's weird.

Here, what ever you make and buy during a marriage belongs to both equally. No matter where it is kept or under which spouse's name it is on.

For example, if my husband bought this house and put it only under his name (something he can't do anyways..) it would still automatically be half mine since I can prove it was bought after marriage.

I do think both spouses should have their own money.. but most of what they make should be shared. And both should have a say on where that shared money goes to.

That's weird.

Here, what ever you make and buy during a marriage belongs to both equally. No matter where it is kept or under which spouse's name it is on.

For example, if my husband bought this house and put it only under his name (something he can't do anyways..) it would still automatically be half mine since I can prove it was bought after marriage.

I do think both spouses should have their own money.. but most of what they make should be shared. And both should have a say on where that shared money goes to.

Why is it weird? Youve never heard of pre nuptial agreements? Here a womans money, property is hers alone. Her husband, family has no right to them at all, EVER. However if her husband divorces her, she gets a divorce settlement (aka pre nup) and if he dies she is entitled to a portion of the inheritance. So as you can see, its a win win situation for the woman. Whats mine is mine and whats his is also mine:p

Why is it weird? Youve never heard of pre nuptial agreements? Here a womans money, property is hers alone. Her husband, family has no right to them at all, EVER. However if her husband divorces her, she gets a divorce settlement (aka pre nup) and if he dies she is entitled to a portion of the inheritance. So as you can see, its a win win situation for the woman. Whats mine is mine and whats his is also mine:p
But if she wants to divorce him and he doesn't want a divorce, he could make her pay him to give her the divorce.

I know of several women who had to "buy" their divorce.

I also know some women who were stupid enough to build a house with their (then) husband, pay as much as he did for all the expenses, and then let the guy put the house in his name. When they got a divorce, the house was obviously his since it was under his name! If a woman is going to contribute then they should be joint owners of the house.

Although I'm a woman and all for women's rights, equality etc etc.. what is unfair is simply unfair.

When you say pre-nup, you mean before marriage. The money and property she has bought before marriage is hers alone. Even money that comes down through inheritance (even during a marriage).. it's hers alone. But.. What is made DURING the marriage belongs to both. Otherwise what is a marriage in the first place? Just the sharing of a bed?

So.. if a woman works it's her money... but if the man works it's their money.. or as much as he decides to give her.

So if the woman doesn't work, she depends on how much her husband THINKS he should give her.. like pocket money. If it's his money and she has no right to it until he dies, she depends on his 'generosity'.. isn't that what it means?

Here.. I have a right to half of what he makes.. and he has a right to half of mine.

So.. if a woman works it's her money... but if the man works it's their money.. or as much as he decides to give her.



That is far as they are married, if he divorces her then she will get her rights as per sharia'a laws.

But if she wants to divorce him and he doesn't want a divorce, he could make her pay him to give her the divorce.

I know of several women who had to "buy" their divorce.

.

These are exceptional cases, the default is that the man is the one who divorce his wife, if the wife has a valid reason and the husband is refusing to divorce her she can go to the court.

Basically, in Islam the man is seen as the breadwinner while the woman's main role is to take care of their home and children. However, nowadays obviously a lot of women choose to work or need to work because life is getting more expensive. Even if a woman makes her own income, she is not obligated to pay for her expenses. It's her right to be "taken care of" by her husband. He is responsible for her basic needs - he provides a place to live in, food, pays all the basic utility bills, etc. If the woman wants to contribute, then it's her choice. An unmarried woman is taken care of by her father, then her husband. If she never marries and her father eventually passes away, she's taken care of by her brother(s). That's just how it works.

Because of this, some girls have the mentality that they don't need to educate themselves or work since their husband will provide for them. Thing is, how do you know you'll get a husband who isn't stingy? Maybe your husband won't be able to provide you with the luxuries your parents did. Also, how do you know the marriage won't end in divorce? Then what? You go back to living with your parents, you depend on them for every little thing once again even though you're a grown woman?

I say better safe than sorry. Even if you don't plan on working after you're married, get an education and keep your degree so you have something to fall back on if/when things get tough.

These are exceptional cases, the default is that the man is the one who divorce his wife, if the wife has a valid reason and the husband is refusing to divorce her she can go to the court.
I don't think they're exceptional, since I personally know a few women who had to get their divorce that way. If I only heard of one or two cases, then yes I'd think they're exceptional, but they're not that uncommon.

this is intresting..

I don't think they're exceptional, since I personally know a few women who had to get their divorce that way. If I only heard of one or two cases, then yes I'd think they're exceptional, but they're not that uncommon.
there r 4 types of divorces
1- the normal divorce, when the husband is the 1 who askes for it
2- khol3 ( which is the divorce asked by the wife ) because she cnt live with thim any more
3-divorce by the court
4-divorce by the sharia

the last 2 dont need the wife or groom to pay anything
but the second the wife has to pay pack something to buy her divorce because the husband dosnt want one

i think in the first 1.. the husband pays something to the wife.. correct me if im mistaken becouse im not sure of this info.

So if the woman doesn't work, she depends on how much her husband THINKS he should give her.. like pocket money. If it's his money and she has no right to it until he dies, she depends on his 'generosity'.. isn't that what it means?

Here.. I have a right to half of what he makes.. and he has a right to half of mine.

Wow then you are lucky! In the rest of the world woman are only entitled to half IF you get divorced, not during the marriage. And even in divorce you have to fight for it in court. So perhaps you are one of the lucky few.:D Good for you. In Islam a man MUST provide his wife with a home, clothing, food and comfort. Its the law.... Here woman have the ultimate choice - if they want to stay home and raise their kids they can and if they choose to work they can - their earnings are their own. I think this is way better than it is in Europe and USA. It doesnt mean you cant contribute to the home (most women do) it just means you dont HAVE to.

These are exceptional cases, the default is that the man is the one who divorce his wife, if the wife has a valid reason and the husband is refusing to divorce her she can go to the court.

When a woman divorces her husband its called Khula and she doesnt BUY her divorce, she must return the dowry he paid her. ( Thats why you should take a lil :p) and its not uncommon anymore for woman to divorce their husbands. Before you get all excited and start harping on about why should she pay him back the dowry? Well why should he pay the divorce settlement? Why in the West do divorces entail exchange of money? In Islam and Oman there are considerations for things like alimony and custody as well.

I don't think they're exceptional, since I personally know a few women who had to get their divorce that way. If I only heard of one or two cases, then yes I'd think they're exceptional, but they're not that uncommon.

Phoenix, few doesn't mean the majority.

there r 4 types of divorces
1- the normal divorce, when the husband is the 1 who askes for it
2- khol3 ( which is the divorce asked by the wife ) because she cnt live with thim any more
3-divorce by the court
4-divorce by the sharia

the last 2 dont need the wife or groom to pay anything
but the second the wife has to pay pack something to buy her divorce because the husband dosnt want one

i think in the first 1.. the husband pays something to the wife.. correct me if im mistaken becouse im not sure of this info.


What is the difference between the standard divorce (1) and divorce by the sharia (4)?

When a woman divorces her husband its called Khula and she doesnt BUY her divorce, she must return the dowry he paid her. ( Thats why you should take a lil :p) and its not uncommon anymore for woman to divorce their husbands. Before you get all excited and start harping on about why should she pay him back the dowry? Well why should he pay the divorce settlement? Why in the West do divorces entail exchange of money? In Islam and Oman there are considerations for things like alimony and custody as well.

I didn't say she buy her divorce, I agree with you she returns the dowry!

On the other hand, do you think the wife can just issue the 'khula' directly without the need of rasing the issue to the court?

Wow then you are lucky! In the rest of the world woman are only entitled to half IF you get divorced, not during the marriage. And even in divorce you have to fight for it in court. So perhaps you are one of the lucky few.:D Good for you. In Islam a man MUST provide his wife with a home, clothing, food and comfort. Its the law.... Here woman have the ultimate choice - if they want to stay home and raise their kids they can and if they choose to work they can - their earnings are their own. I think this is way better than it is in Europe and USA. It doesnt mean you cant contribute to the home (most women do) it just means you dont HAVE to.
It doesn't make a difference. Being entitled to something doesn't mean one has to be forced by the courts to give it to you. If I am entitled to half this house, then it means it is half mine right now. Not just in the case of a divorce. I have a say on what happens to it because it was bought during marriage. My husband can't decide to sell it without my approval and I couldn't do the same thing.

Well Thalia, that's not the case in Oman or Islam. It's different. What's yours is what's assigned to your name. Period.

That's weird.

Here, what ever you make and buy during a marriage belongs to both equally. No matter where it is kept or under which spouse's name it is on.

For example, if my husband bought this house and put it only under his name (something he can't do anyways..) it would still automatically be half mine since I can prove it was bought after marriage.

I do think both spouses should have their own money.. but most of what they make should be shared. And both should have a say on where that shared money goes to.

That's not how it works here. If anything happens here, the women are not as protected as the West. As Endure said, you're only really entitled to what has your name on it. The women have to be smart if they want to remain well protected in the event of a divorce. All you get is an alimony or some sort of compensation if a divorce occurs. But so long as the house, the cars and whatever is under his name, it stays that way after marriage and you go back to your parents house or whatever.

That's why one needs to be cautious with their money after marriage. Don't make it easy for anyone to take advantage of your status, not even your dear husband.

No I don't share, even if I am married, even if I have kids. I will have my own bank account and he will have his own. However, it is not a bad idea if a portion of my salary and a portion of his salary go to a third joint bank account where the purpose of that account is for our children or any other joint responsibilities. But for the most part, our monies are not mixing because it can have severe implications if anything goes wrong. This does not mean you can't contribute financially to the household.

I know too many women who have been conned by their husbands; husbands who have taken their money and the law does not protect them since it is their money too! So as a precaution, keep it separate. And La samaha Alla (God willingly), you split up, at least the division of the assets will be easier.

For me I would much rather have a his and her bank account and then a third "house" account where a % of each salary (if both are working) goes into the pot to pay the mortgage and house bills. That way if a woman or man wants to buy a toy or whatever they can because their house bills are taken cared of first.

For me I would much rather have a his and her bank account and then a third "house" account where a % of each salary (if both are working) goes into the pot to pay the mortgage and house bills. That way if a woman or man wants to buy a toy or whatever they can because their house bills are taken cared of first.
That is probably the best way to manage money.. but at the end of the day, it's only about how it is split and having your own purses. ALL the money still belongs to both.

If a wife comes to me, talks such rubbish about my & her money, then fukc her along with her money, she can go to hell

Phoenix, few doesn't mean the majority.
I know.. but it's not that uncommon, that's my point. The chances of things happening that way are not one in a million.

If a wife comes to me, talks such rubbish about my & her money, then fukc her along with her money, she can go to hell

tsk tsk hitman you really are starting to sound like a "hit"man....such passion!

what's mine is mine what's his is mine too

joking.
we both work, we both earn. we have two separate accounts and a joint one but we have access to each other's accounts. we know each other's pin numbers and we move money according to how the family needs it. most of the time, all day to day financial things are left to me. he takes care of some things, sometimes he asks me to take care of them. depends who's using the computer at the time (all bills are paid online). when his account runs out, i put some money into his and vice versa.

That sounds cool Minerva because you have to trust your spouse. Hitman's remark still made me laugh though. He loves the fukc word...I wonder what his dream woman is wink wink......

That sounds cool Minerva because you have to trust your spouse. Hitman's remark still made me laugh though. He loves the fukc word...I wonder what his dream woman is wink wink......
i think hitman's in a 'mood' today. :hyper:

well regarding to finances, we have to trust each other. all the accounts have the statements on them...we know what we buy and how we are managing them.