I read over the weekend that the groom does not have to be present at an Islamic wedding

Is this true?

yeah she doesn't have to be there in person but some one she assigns from her men relatives can talk on behalf her.

habits varies with traditions

why are you so puzzled about it !?

Thanks for your reply

What I read was that the Man (groom) does not have to be at the wedding

I did not realise that the woman (bride) does not have to be there as well

They will meet in the bed room.

Lets hope they get the right room.......

Can you clarify for me:

Is it true that the Man does not have to present at his wedding?

and

Is also true that the woman does not have to be present at her wedding?

PS Can neither of them be present?

the groom shouldn't enter the hall where all women are gathered unless they cover up and he doesn't stay there for long
as soon as he enters he sits there for a while and then leaves with his bride that's the whole story :)

Perhaps I am not explaining myself very well

Is it true that the Groom/husband-to-be does not have to be present at an Islamic wedding (i.e. he could be in a separate City)?

Thanks

About the Groom, I never witnessed such things, but it is possible

About the bride, since most muslims have the Nikah/Milka in the mosques, the bride assigns someone (her father/brother most of the time) to attend instead.

right after that, they are announced a husband and a wife, the groom goes to the bride's house to take her OR both families celebrate the wedding in a hotel or such places

So it's like this,a Nikah first (takes place sometimes in a houses but most of the time in a mosque) which is done by The Groom & the Bride (or others who represent each) and an Imam who reads the Nikah
THEN a wedding celebration (sometimes they don't) at a hotel or a house

Perhaps I am not explaining myself very well

Is it true that the Groom/husband-to-be does not have to be present at an Islamic wedding (i.e. he could be in a separate City)?

Thanks

The Groom SHOULD be present at the wedding cause he have to sign his marriage contract

BUT if he is in a far COUNTRY where he can't attend his wedding ( cause of work or study ) aboard and sign then he should have his father to be on his behalf !

BUT the main, he should attend

This is what I know, unless others have different views

I will try to look for an Islamic evidence.

Yes mr p, you're right. Neither the groom nor the bride have to be present to "sign the contract", or in other words, say their wedding vows. They can can assign a "substitute" to do it for them. For example, in Oman, the bride is usually not present while the groom is. The bride's male guardian, if present (!!!!!!!), says her "I do". In other countries such as Sudan, neither the groom nor the bride attend. Their male guardians say their "I dos" for them. In yet other countries, they both attend and say their vows in person. Basically, it depends on which part of the Islamic world we're talking about. And no, I don't have evidence I'm afraid.

I guess the problem of a late groom or a runaway bride becomes obsolete. lol.

What is the definition of an Islamic wedding?

The matrimony takes place in a mosque usually where the groom & witnesses are present along with the father of the bride who will be representing her (the most common scenario)

Official documents can be obtained later once the above is done

Rest are trivial matters

So what I read was correct, the Man/Groom does not have to be in the Mosque when the marriage service takes place - he could be in a foreign country

Thank you for your replies

So what I read was correct, the Man/Groom does not have to be in the Mosque when the marriage service takes place - he could be in a foreign country



That is incorrect, the groom must be present at the mosque

Perhaps most were referring to the wedding party itself which is the aftermath & optional, in this case the groom can be present or absent or even dead

That is true he must attend to accept the wife in front of the witnesses. After that they can do whatever they want.

Hitty,

This is the link where I read this:

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/world/iraq/article1364681.ece

Obviously, this is a very sad story - but for the purposes of this thread, I am purely focusing on the following:

Luckily the groom doesn’t have to be present at a Muslim wedding so we went ahead without him

I think if you read Braiki reply above you will understand.

Pinnochio,

Quoting from the link you provided: "My wedding had been different to most in the world. I wore a simple white dress and the closest members of my family came, but no friends"

The above is not referring to the matrimony that takes place in the mosque where the groom must be present

As I already mentioned, the party & dance are trivial matters & are varying from a place to another, presence or absence of the groom won't matter

I think you should point out that it's pretty usual for the signing of the wedding contract to be on one day and the party to be on another, sometimes even months later.

I knew a muslim couple who even though they had the contract, they waited till the party before they lived together... which was like 6 weeks later.

Thanks Hitty,

My interpretation of her statement was that her husband was not present at her wedding - i.e. at the moqsue

I am assuming that being married in a mosque is the only way to get wed?

As you say, the party is trivial

That is incorrect, the groom must be present at the mosque

Perhaps most were referring to the wedding party itself which is the aftermath & optional, in this case the groom can be present or absent or even dead
I wasn't referring to the wedding party in my post above, I was referring to the matrimony at the mosque, or "the signing of the contract" as I've made it clear. It varies from (Islamic) country to country, but the groom doesn't always have to be present, as in the case of Sudan

I knew a muslim couple who even though they had the contract, they waited till the party before they lived together... which was like 6 weeks later.
Yes, that happens a lot in Oman and probably other countries. Sometimes it's a couple of months, and sometimes it's years.

I am assuming that being married in a mosque is the only way to get wed?


The matrimony takes place in a mosque usually where the groom & witnesses are present along with the father of the bride who will be representing her (the most common scenario)

As you see I have mentioned between the brackets: most common scenario, but that is not necessarily the only scenario

Mosque is chosen as it is a blessed place & the Imam reads his blessings on the newly married couple, but it can take place anywhere, even in the house

I am not aware of any such marriage that took place in Oman where the groom wasn't present in front of the witnesses, as he must testify that he accepts her as his wife...etc

If he isn't there, then who shall the Imam/Sheik ask: do you accept Mary/Julie as your wife three times front of the witnesses?

My Aunt got married without the husband being present at the mosque. However, he will need to assign someone to be there instead of him and the shiekh has to know that before hand.

The woman (in Omani culture) is not present at the mosque. However, the shiekh should get her approval whether by asking her father or if he doubt that her father is forcing her by asking her personally.

All cleared up

Thanks