1. Why is the society unkind and harsh to divorced women. It regards them as 'secondhand' but how can a woman be secondhand?

2. and when men do take interest in a Divorced woman, they want a lover !!!!! or more bluntly easy sex !!!!!!!!!

why is it that way I mean just coz she is divorced for whatever reasons that does not make her fresh meat .......... :lift:

well i am back

love all originally Jawhar Jewels

I think that people who say that look at it from the whole virginity aspect. Basically, a divorced woman is no longer untouched, so they see her as "used goods". :rolleyes:

well... i do c ur point but shouldnt ppl change that veiw

It is up to u to look at the divorced man, the same way...:6:

but that thinking is stupid...but looking to our near history (my father and grandfather), they did not seem to have that look at divorced women..:think:
It is this generation who made a big deal out of it...

well i think this image of devorsed women has been out since a long time but is kind of minimising these days.. maybi in bahrain.. coz they r a lot of divorce cases n every1's fine wit it.. i cnt help it when it dosnt work or u have problems accuring.. n it dosnt always have to be the wifes foult.. maybi part of thinking they r second hand besides the "used goods " issue... they think that the couse of divorce was her n that she's just a pain... but in a lot of cases men r a pain too !
>>> ahh i hate our sociaty !

welll men arent looked at the way women are when a divorce takes place ....

i ask this question coz i got married and then divorced less than a year into my marriage ... i told my parents about what was going on toward the end since my health was at risk ... when i finally told them they my family demanded that he accept that the marriage was over and give me my divorce .... situation so bad that my father didnt want anything frm them just my sanity and well being and me to be out before any children happened....

i am not ashamed of being divorced in fact i am glad to be out of it however i now face a new problem ...... other men etc ppl i know who now think oh young, divorced assuming i dont want to marry again they assum that i am available to them excure me for being explicit but now think ok this is convinient relationship all allowed and no commmitment .... how degrading is that..... this initially made me into a hermit i stopped going out socializing etc i reciently started to be out there what ppl said didnt bother me or my family but i have good friends and family .....

but what about those who dont have the support or get sucked into all the above deciet etc .....

we have all said that we know its difficult and try and empethise with others who have complained about being divorced in the sociaty and culture and those who dont coz they are affaid of the stigma .... but unless u have been through it u really dont know how degrading other human beings can make u feel... women and men in general .....

as for me i take every day as it comes i have good day and bad days but if am out i am very seceptical when am approched by a man i mean so much more than before .....

People are not items to be considered 'second hand' or 'spoiled goods'.. we are creatures with feelings and we all deserve a second or even 3rd chance in living a normal and beautiful life.

Basically, a divorced woman is no longer untouched, so they see her as "used goods". :rolleyes:
Ha ha true =p which is very shallow and low in my opinion. I mean she was a married woman once so she's definitely not gonna be a virgin.

society i guess we cant really do anything can we or can we ?????

Jawhar^Jewels I sympathise with u. Maybe u should not inform any man, when u first meet; that u are divorced. Im not saying to lie, just dont mention it. State that u are a single woman, let the man to get to know u and once you feel that the relationship has become to a mutual understanding then notify him...Im not saying that it has to be a love relationship, any relationship. Its nobodies business to know about ur past unless u inform them and make it their business. People can be harsh towards a divorced woman but it depends on the society....not everybody is harsh there are kind hearted people out there.....I have a friend that got out of a marriage within the 1st year and it is really depressing and she has no family support only a friendship support who happens to be on the otherside of the world at this moment but she is doing well....U have to keep the faith especially since you have great family and friend support. And keep it strong....thankfully you got ur sanity in the end which is the main thing and ur marriage has made u into a fighter...U move forward girl and dont let anyone stand in ur way...:)

It's sad that society views divorced women in this way, but they do. As soon as most people learn a woman is divorced, they think that she is unfit to be a wife. They start to get suspicious and speculate about the circumstances that lead to the divorce - and they almost always blame it on the woman herself.

thank u A Bella for your heart felt msg but getting back to the topic why should i hide the truth shall we say and it also its not men asking me like that only its men whom i dont know who happen to have asked or gotten my number who make calls and ask or send msges and i dont know who they are anyway ...... like u said i have a great support group family and friends ....

and Libellula and all others thank u ......

but dont u all think that for the time were living in things should change ......

Because when people hear divorce they say, well obviously someone must have been unbearable to live with - it's either the man or the woman. Sometimes the blame goes to the man, sometimes to the woman.

The only thing the divorced people can do is go on living their lives in their society the way they usually do, and if they really are good people, no one would dare say a word against them.

I won't marry someone divorced with children

No children, I don't mind

society i guess we cant really do anything can we or can we ?????Yes, someone should start and give the example but few do for now
Maybe in 30-40 years something will change

well in life we win we loose and i guess ppl in our part of the world should start looking differently and i know its going to take time but this threard is to bring more light no body wasnt to admit that they are hurting or have been hurt by the divorce or otherwise and the divorce rate it increasing .....as for pp with children.... i cant speak for those who have children or for the children who are a product of a failed marriage .....

fatamoo said: "Because when people hear divorce they say, well obviously someone must have been unbearable to live with - it's either the man or the woman. Sometimes the blame goes to the man, sometimes to the woman.

The only thing the divorced people can do is go on living their lives in their society the way they usually do, and if they really are good people, no one would dare say a word against them."

I won't say that wiser words were never said, but those were some pretty wise words from a young lady.

welll men arent looked at the way women are when a divorce takes place ....

i ask this question coz i got married and then divorced less than a year into my marriage ... i told my parents about what was going on toward the end since my health was at risk ... when i finally told them they my family demanded that he accept that the marriage was over and give me my divorce .... situation so bad that my father didnt want anything frm them just my sanity and well being and me to be out before any children happened....

i am not ashamed of being divorced in fact i am glad to be out of it however i now face a new problem ...... other men etc ppl i know who now think oh young, divorced assuming i dont want to marry again they assum that i am available to them excure me for being explicit but now think ok this is convinient relationship all allowed and no commmitment .... how degrading is that..... this initially made me into a hermit i stopped going out socializing etc i reciently started to be out there what ppl said didnt bother me or my family but i have good friends and family .....

but what about those who dont have the support or get sucked into all the above deciet etc .....

we have all said that we know its difficult and try and empethise with others who have complained about being divorced in the sociaty and culture and those who dont coz they are affaid of the stigma .... but unless u have been through it u really dont know how degrading other human beings can make u feel... women and men in general .....

as for me i take every day as it comes i have good day and bad days but if am out i am very seceptical when am approched by a man i mean so much more than before .....


i would say people dont know the reasons behind your divorce that's why they say what they say.i believe one thing and that is if one of those poeple or one of his relatives is going through the same situation then trust me they will change they perspective.