I was reading a certain book, and one of the central issues was the 'Love Laws': they determine who we are allowed to fall in love with, and how, and how much. As an example, in India, you arent allowed to fall in love with an Untouchable if you are of a higher social class: its just unthinkable. That kind of thing. My question is: what governs these love laws? And in your view, what are the love laws...who should we be allowed to fall in love with, and who is off limits...

And Why.





Look forward to your answers :).

Love has no law I believe.
If you have prejudices you are not a true lover.
No calulation and true devotion is LovEs Law. :love:

I think traditions restrict love & its rules!

I think traditions restrict love & its rules!

totally true ,,, and specially here in the arabic area ,,, the traditions play a very big and basic role in the love ,,, and many love sotries dont reach the normal end cause of it ,,,,

Do you think these traditions, cultural restraints should limit who we are allowed to fall in love with?

yes i think so!! i strongly believe that ppl form different background should not mixed (i don't meant as a racist comment, so no offence please!!). There is a quote from the novel “the note book” which explains what I am trying to say ((your future is dic by whtated by who we are as opposed to what we want)) ……. can not just abandon everything, and follow our desires, we have responsibilities and ppl to think of.

I dont think its fair to have laws when it comes to love. No one can totaly control what their heart desires and so why cause such frustration and pain?

If there is love and understanding then anything can work.

Am sure each one has their own laws when it comes to luv, but Once you fall in luv they Vanish automatically.

Do you think these traditions, cultural restraints should limit who we are allowed to fall in love with?

:D exactly the hell i was thinking about PT, how did u read my mind :scratch:

Yeah some olod traditions limit and have laws on love..But lets face reality and the world out there...Love knows no rule and limits!

Good comment HaYa, showing the reason you stole my title :D


This should add a twist: should someone be allowed to fall in love with their brother or sister?

This should add a twist: should someone be allowed to fall in love with their brother or sister?

:Shock:
what kind of love you are talking about ?

Im talking about incest. If we should be allowed to fall in love with whoever we want, why not them? Why not someone of the same sex?

Love laws. Gotta have them. But can we justify them?

To get things clear, I AM NOT INCESTUAL! :yuk: Just trying to start a debate. :)

I think traditions restrict love & its rules!
Excellent thought as always, but at same time you are creating other laws, which rules are you talking about?

PT there are Solid unchangeable Rules, No matter what, they can not be changed and the example u gave is under the solid unchangeable rules. The laws i was refering to more to do with individual & family choices .

I know. But what determines those solid, unchangeable rules? Being moral, religious people, we know its wrong and unnatural. But to some people, the question can be delved deeper. Yet I dont know anyone who doesnt find incest despicable.

But okay, lets go back to the cultural family rules because thats more interesting, and a less hasslesome topic. Should families intermarry? Should people marry people of other, completely different ethnic backgrounds and religions? In what cases should they not?


:)

I think there can be as many laws and rules as people want governing, who, when and how we should love, but at the end of the day the heart wants what the heart wants, right? And also people have to remember that there are different kinds of love, like love for Allah, for the prophet Muhammad (PBUH), in between lovers, mother and child, father and child, sibling affection, love between friends.... and the main thing is not to mistake one emotion for another - I think that may be how incest happens (wa3) ...

But it's hard to tell yourself not to love a certain type of person because you just don't know who you might end up with!!

I'm trying to imagine myself in love with my brother!!!! ::vomit::

I personally believe that everything in this world is governed by rules and laws from a simple insect to a great human being.

I think there are unconscious rules and laws we follow, that’s why we have expectations. Those rules are within us since day one, when we learn what is ok and what’s not.

I believe if we were never taught to differentiate we would maybe love our brother's, we grew up watching and that’s what frame us. I remember once reading a story about a certain group in africa where woman marry their brother's their son..etc and to it realy did prove my theory which is our level of perceiving whats right and whats not, if it wasn't those rules or laws those people who marry their son’s and brother’s wouldn’t have done it.

I wish if we were brought up without having those boundaries of color, class, and anything else that differentiates us, I wish if we were all perceived as humans and the rule or law was to seek the good hearted, respectful person

My question is: what governs these love laws? And in your view, what are the love laws...who should we be allowed to fall in love with, and who is off limits...

And Why.

its the society !! and to your second quetsion I would follow the society laws even if to some extent I dont agree with them.

as bloom said, we have responsibilites. I wouldnt put my family in a position thats not comfortable to them. The society law is, you are allowed to "fall in love" with certain people only. Though it might not sound intresting enough to be adventrous, but I know how breaking such a law would break my family's heart (and yah pride). I dont want to do that to them, so I would take responsibilty and follow the love law set for me.

I wish if we were brought up without having those boundaries of color, class, and anything else that differentiates us, I wish if we were all perceived as humans and the rule or law was to seek the good hearted, respectful person

VERY amazing.. but how would we be able to differentiate eachothers???

Anyway.. My post regarding the topic.
Laws governing love are something that is inpracticable like the one mentioned above regarding the Indian society in regard to low and high classes people as they call it. I guess it is something ignorant, love is not about money or hierarchy, it is one of the very few things in this world that can be dealt with and exist between people regardless of any differences between them.

However, we can say love rules, which are not set there by a statute or legislation, instead these rules should be set and agreed by the persons who are in a love relationship. this might includes commitments and duties that both parties should undertake and execute and wbe willing to sacrifice foe each other. !

Excellent thought as always, but at same time you are creating other laws, which rules are you talking about?

The Rule: " To whome you r suppose to fall in love & whome you can't" !!

as mentioned above , the society may introduce some laws n' rules ,ppl don't have to follow , but the point is , is u put aside ur emotion for a while n' think about it rationally. what kind of probs u gonna face ! coz all those kind of differences i e backgrounds, language, religion , etc can ruin any happeness based on emtions n' only on emotions .

So love is not everythin' u shouldn't neglect other factors which can play major role in the whole process .

al7ilwa u cant tell urself to fall in love with someone just because ur sapposed to fall in love with some1 that type... love has no laws.. but falling in love with ur sister ,brother ,mom, dad is just wrong .. cause theyr ur blood.. they came out from the same person u did .. so thats just argghhh YUCK!.. but wht im trying to say is although its wrong for u to fall in love with ur brother or part of ur family u still cant stop ur feelings..and who u fall in love with.. it just happens.. u can keep telling urself to stop loving them but then in ur heart u still do .. the thing that i hate is like if u fall in love with some1 and theyr shee3i or ibathi or whtever but the oppasite of u .. ur parents would dissaprove of them .. and that isnt fair.. arnt we all the same?! we'r all muslims we all believe in god we all do the same things but in differant ways... so why not let them be 2gether !? even if u dont .. theyd still run off get married and have a family without thair parents in it ! theyd just make things worse.. y cant they see that true love is just too hard to break ... emm,.. yeahh again,, love has no laws.. just for the brother sister part! yuck thtz just wrong!
okay.. i think im mixing up things again..
am i making sense?

Romeo and Juliet!!! I'm reading it in school now, and it's all about this stuff ... it's the kind of story that disproves the theory that you can only fall in love with someone that your circle in society approves of. Love is a personal and emotional, not a social thing. So SOCIETY cannot impose rules on it, in my opinion.

And what was the end of Romeo and Juliet?

They both died.

What's the point of love if you won't get to have it?

I think there's a different moral behind the story, one that is not so apparent.

Interesting thread.

Just something I thought I would add. We shouldn't blame the society because WE are actually part of it. If you want change, then you've gotta start it.

Now, back to love... ;)

First off, nice thread PT.

Well, I believe that no laws govern who should/can/could love someone and how they are to be loved. Every human being to their own, I say, once they're of legal age, but ofcourse one's parents should have some kind of a say in their child's relationships.

Regarding the 'un-touchables' concept ... yes, back in the days in India, Brahmins (considered higher caste) wouldn't marry people from any other caste. Similar was the case with a couple of other castes too, I think. Such things are officially banned, as per governmental policies, but what child would report one's dad/mom if their own parents followed such practices? Eventually cultural practices like this would wear out in a couple of generations, when kids learn not to discruminate based on their race/color/sex etc.

Talking about incest, it does happen in some rural parts of South India, Africa and a few places in the Middle East. Don't know how it started about, but its sick according to me and I don't see any point to it. Besides, its biologically not a good combination for the kid born either, I hear.

But okay, lets go back to the cultural family rules because thats more interesting, and a less hasslesome topic. Should families intermarry? Should people marry people of other, completely different ethnic backgrounds and religions? In what cases should they not?


:)

If it were totally upto me, I'd marry a girl I truly love without thinking about her ethnicity or religion. The only stumbling stones I'd have to step through would be her opinion about it and her parents'. If they're cool with it, I don't see why we shouldn't ... and oh yeah, I WOULD NOT care about society's views regarding OUR marriage either.

If you calculate be4 falling in LOVE, you can't tell that love! You better call that making an love affair.:(

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