I'll tell you a story about a lame excuse for a man.... he isn't a man, he's an insensitive @$$ and then some.

This guy was 'courting' someone I know, he was sweet, he said all the right things at all the right times, he told her he loved her, made her feel special, spent night and day with her and when they were appart he messaged her, called her... did all those things that guys do to make a girl fall for them. She did, and she fell mighty hard too. For his birthday she gave him a diary which she started to keep shortly after their relationship began. In it she had written down all her feelings for him; the sweetness of romance. He saw one day, on her finger a ring which had been given to her by her late brother. He liked it, she gave it to him entrusting him with something so dear to her heart... and in that showing him how much he meant to her. Months went by...

She gets a call from 4 girls one day, these 4 invite her over... tell her that the guy she loves and adores slept with a classmate of hers.

She's in shock, she doesn't believe. She confronts him the next day, he denies at first... by later succumbs to admitting. He tells her he's sorry, he doesn't want to loose her. That it was only a one time thing and he couldn't control himself because the girl was coming onto him too strong.

She doesn't want to admit it but she's leaning towards forgiving him. She believes he loves her. He begs, she softens more. But she listens to a voice in the backround telling her to STAY away from him and not give in. So she barely does. She answers the phone, lets him call her but she's numb. She doesn't want to let him back in .. but she still loves him and tries to believe that he just made a mistake.

She gets a call two weeks later; his best friend who's also her good friend tells her he doesn't want to see her get hurt: He's seen the guy with the same girl he slept with at Starbucks having coffee. She tells herself, this is it.

He continues to call her and tell her he loves her, he needs her and will she please forgive him? She doesn't respond. He even sends her messages that he misses her WHILE he's with the other girl... doing god knows what.

She stops answering his calls, doesn't reply to messages. He sends a sms, saying he's got something important to tell her and would she please answer the phone just this once? So she does. He tells her he's getting engaged to this girl, she assumes its the girl he's been sleeping with, he says no... its his cousin. His family is forcing him and he can't do anything about it (ya, really a man!). But.. well listen babe, even if I do get married to this girl.. there's still hope for us. She won't have to know.

........

And then you people wonder why I hate men? :eyes:

I just wanna know why some guys are the way they are. Have they no feelings? So insensitive; broke an innocent girl's heart and is on the way to break two more. I hate players with a detest reserved soely for them.

Questions:

~ Why are some guys players?

~ What are some signs that show that a guy is a player except for the obvious ones like sleeping with someone?

~ How do you know if you can trust a guy when most of them are mirror images of this guy?

whgy why ? now i hate guys even more....and im turning into a sexist soon , seriuosly .~!!!

1-some guys are players bcuz they think its power for them to own more than one heart, where its stupidity ...


2-the signs are: * when he looks at himslef in the mirror more than looking into his girls eyes... *WHEN he does his best to look the sexy aLL THE TIME with his car and watch sticking out of his shirt !

3- thats a tough one... i dont think i can answer that ...

if a guy is in relation, no matter what sort...and the lady he is with is really GOOD (from all aspects)...i doubt he will become a player!

lack of satisfaction leads to it! maybe!

Originally posted by Enigma
Questions:

~ Why are some guys players?

~ What are some signs that show that a guy is a player except for the obvious ones like sleeping with someone?

~ How do you know if you can trust a guy when most of them are mirror images of this guy?

hello Engi.


Well , at the moment i have a friend and she is going through the same thing with the person she thinks she loves him........
Me and my other friend kept advicing her not to go back......and he is clear that he is a player........

======
any way answering ur questions:

- Cause they think the more girls they get involved with the more it shows that they are a Macho:duh:

-Personnaly if i have seen him talking to me and to another girl in the same way of teasing , then i would call him a player.
or, If he had been talking to me and he is stairing at another girl then he is a player.
or, if i have been told that he is been going with other girls while i am with him, then for sure he is a player but i have to make sure of what it had been said........
or, if he dates 2 girls at the same time and the same place, then giving an excuse that she is only a friend then, sorry he is 10000% player......

-It is hard to trust a guy who had been cheating on u, but i still believe in giving a chance.....but only one Chance to prove that he is not going to do it again, even though u can not gurantee that 2.........



AS u said 1 man can reflects the image of other mens........

===

Personnaly it is hard from my side ,in just to trust a man just like this .....
it would take me a very long time to trust........

Originally posted by Enigma

And then you people wonder why I hate men? :eyes:

I just wanna know why some guys are the way they are. Have they no feelings? So insensitive; broke an innocent girl's heart and is on the way to break two more. I hate players with a detest reserved soely for them.

Questions:

~ Why are some guys players?

~ What are some signs that show that a guy is a player except for the obvious ones like sleeping with someone?

~ How do you know if you can trust a guy when most of them are mirror images of this guy?



:D.......... My problems, I keep thinking the worst! I can't stand that about myself! Instead of thinking good thoughts, I put bad thoughts, doubts, and negative comments in my head....... I struggle every day with trying to fight those nagging thoughts!.......Special if I see young girls from 17 yrs to 20yrs I get confused I don't really know what 2 do!........... :)

How is it that some people can think so positive all the time, and others so negative? So weird! :)


Sister Enigma, the reason why you hate man because you still not in love with them, the day your going to be in love with them you will start to love them!........:)


Out of therad: Wow... it sounds like you've leaded a really great life, where you triumphed over man......that life's been sending your way...... Now, it seems like you've made it somewhere only few can go... and this is somewhere special (husband).... Would it be considered special if everyone could get there? Most likely not..... Either that or you're just really lucky........But still, I’m happy for you in your success in short time!..............:)

This is a very sad and heartbreaking story Enigma, thanks for sharing, so that we can continually be aware of this problem :( .

Originally posted by Enigma

Questions:

~ Why are some guys players?

~ What are some signs that show that a guy is a player except for the obvious ones like sleeping with someone?

~ How do you know if you can trust a guy when most of them are mirror images of this guy?

1- Hmm I think as Solafa said it's something to do with being macho. But also that he is insecure and that he needs to prove that he is a man and not get tied by one woman. Also he doesn't have strong values and ethics, in a sense that he does not consider someone else's feelings.

2- Smooth talking after only meeting you once or twice. Normally as soon as I meet some guy for the first time and he already starts to excessively flirt and smooth talk, I know instantly that he is a player and quietly move away.

3- If he doesn't do the above. If he doesn't smooth talk with women, even if he had the chance, coz he doesn't want to "lead her on." Even if you test him, by showing that you are impressed by him and praise him, he doesn't take advantage of that and starts smooth talking.

this is bad
as for why some/most males are that way i've no clue been trying to figure that out my self
but i've to say not all males are the same
how to trust a guy again can't help u to trust him you need to put tabs on him and all althought it sucks but what to do

i'm sorry that happened and i'm sorry that there are ppl out there who still do it

but not all males are that way there are female's who play and i've been there
crazy world we live in

Originally posted by Enigma

And then you people wonder why I hate men? :eyes:



MEN? I believe you were talking about ONE man up there dear. and besides.. there is also a girl there who's involved ( the one who slept with him) does that mean that all girls are sl*ts? Nope .. not at all.

one hand alone doesnt clap.

------------

Anyways.. why some guys are players? same reasons some girls are ****s i guess.. lack of security.. lack of morality.. no religious boundries to stop then from commiting sin... etc..etc.

signs and trust? ahh.. they all differ from one person to the other..so i would rather not get into it.

That gives a soo repeated lesson to all of the girls out there(specially the supposed to be ''muslims'') .....Don't you ever trust us ....we are driven by our sexual passions....we lie when we say that we love you ...we just want to feel the so lame sexual feeling by saying it......there's no love before marrige ..there's just cheatings and desposing ..

So girls please ..stay away from us:bored:

Originally posted by sad_dreamer
That gives a soo repeated lesson to all of the girls out there(specially the supposed to be ''muslims'') .....Don't you ever trust us ....we are driven by our sexual passions....we lie when we say that we love you ...we just want to feel the so lame sexual feeling by saying it......there's no love before marrige ..there's just cheatings and desposing ..

So girls please ..stay away from us:bored:

My sentiments exactly.


--

Nabhan, I don't hate ALL men... erm, just most of them.

~ Why are some guys players?

A wrong notion of 'getting' love and not being controlled by one single woman, generally makes a guy a playa.

~ What are some signs that show that a guy is a player except for the obvious ones like sleeping with someone?

Flirting with more than one girl, calling them sweet names and constantly telling them how 'beautiful' they are and not like most women the guy's met?

~ How do you know if you can trust a guy when most of them are mirror images of this guy?

You have to get to know the person. If the guy's a player, then you shouldn't get too close with him and let him use you. Otherwise, congratulations ...

Besides, most men aren't that way either. If you think so, its kind of your fault for not meeting the right kind. ;)

Originally posted by Enigma
Nabhan, I don't hate ALL men... erm, just most of them.

lol.. how cute. but hey.. u should have mentioned that above. :p

anyways.. dont u agree that it takes TWO?

a man..if alone..cant be a player. if the woman sets him straight..then he wouldnt a chance to play around.

Originally posted by NaBHaN


a man..if alone..cant be a player. if the woman sets him straight..then he wouldnt a chance to play around.


:duh:

Are you suggesting that a man needs a woman to control him so that he doesn't play around with girls?

No I DON'T think it takes two... if the other girls don't know about his other girls then what on earth has that got to do with them!

That's so sad :(

Well, to me, I cannot trust a guy even if he turned the world upside down.. The only way I am going to trust him is when he comes right in front of my family, approaches me through the door and through the window. This is more respectful, and what our religion states.. so why do all the other meaningless stuff?

~ Why are some guys players?


well they think it's past of being a man........i really hate those type of guys i wouldnt call them men they arent yet.... they need to grow up and see the real world....

~ Why are some guys players?

They just wanna "have fun", and they dont feel like getting committed to one person.

~ What are some signs that show that a guy is a player except for the obvious ones like sleeping with someone?

If he agrees with everything you say just to make you happy. If he says all the sweetest things, and you start thinking "isn't this too good to be true?". If he flirts with every and any girl... so many signs.

~ How do you know if you can trust a guy when most of them are mirror images of this guy?

Well, the thing is 'Playas' try to appear like they're perfect, so that all the girls fall for 'em and stuff. They dont care about what you feel, and keep saying they love you whenever they do something wrong, as though it'll clear everything up. Besides, trust needs time.. and no one can act forever.

Originally posted by Enigma
:duh:

Are you suggesting that a man needs a woman to control him so that he doesn't play around with girls?



well from the looks of it some men do need a woman to say no in order to set them straight.

----------

No I DON'T think it takes two... if the other girls don't know about his other girls then what on earth has that got to do with them!

that doesnt justify her sleeping with him!! :duh:

Originally posted by NaBHaN
well from the looks of it some men do need a woman to say no in order to set them straight.

Hmph.

that doesnt justify her sleeping with him!! :duh:

The story is about this GUY, the player NOT about the girl sleeping with him! :duh:

Originally posted by Enigma



The story is about this GUY, the player NOT about the girl sleeping with him! :duh:

obviously she's a player too if she was able to sleep with him. ;)

so i guess she falls under that category.

----

i just dont see why u want us to focus on the guy and leave out the girl.. who is probably even worse than the guy.

Originally posted by NaBHaN
obviously she's a player too if she was able to sleep with him. ;)

so i guess she falls under that category.

----

i just dont see why u want us to focus on the guy and leave out the girl.. who is probably even worse than the guy.

A player is someone who is with multiple partners at the same time. This girl is just with the one guy; she might be a sl*t but she's not a player.

The story is about the GUY. The thread is about PLAYERS... NOT SL*TS! Duh.

Originally posted by NaBHaN
that doesnt justify her sleeping with him!! :duh:


It doesn’t justify her sleeping with him, true. It doesn’t justify the guy sleeping with her either. God knows how many other girls he fooled. He’ll get on with his life like nothing ever happened and the girls will always be blamed for their stupidity.

And wait a minute, WHY is she 'probably worse' than him?!

Nabhan are you doing a double standard here by implying that if a girl sleeps with ONE guy she's worse than a guy who's sleeping with more than one girl?!

Originally posted by Enigma
And wait a minute, WHY is she 'probably worse' than him?!

Nabhan are you doing a double standard here by implying that if a girl sleeps with ONE guy she's worse than a guy who's sleeping with more than one girl?!

and how do u know that she slept with one guy? ;) .. if she can so easily lead that guy into sleeping with her.. then god knows how many times she's done it..and with how many guys.

no double standards or anything.. i just prefer to look at them BOTH. instead of focusin on one side only. :)

Originally posted by NaBHaN
obviously she's a player too if she was able to sleep with him. ;)

so i guess she falls under that category.

----

i just dont see why u want us to focus on the guy and leave out the girl.. who is probably even worse than the guy.

Maybe we can call her a fool for falling for him, but not a playa. He might have convinced her that he’ll marry her after that so she needn’t worry. He might’ve pressured her into it. Or maybe she did it with her own will, you never know. Just because she slept with him doesn’t make her a playa. Maybe she was devoted to him and loved him with all her heart, and just did it to prove her love and trust in him. Just because she slept with him doesn't mean she did it with other guys.

Originally posted by NaBHaN
and how do u know that she slept with one guy? ;) .. if she can so easily lead that guy into sleeping with her.. then god knows how many times she's done it..and with how many guys.

no double standards or anything.. i just prefer to look at them BOTH. instead of focusin on one side only. :)

Nabhan, bringing up the girl and whatever mistake she's done doesn't make the guy's action's justified. There's really no point in talking about the girl here.

Basically what you are trying to do here is make the girl look bad for the guy's sake.

Are men so lame as to blame the girl for 'seducing' them and not be able to be a real man and STOP himself from doing anything wrong? Moral and religious belief's aside, you are hurting another person.

Originally posted by Echo
Maybe we can call her a fool for falling for him, but not a playa. He might have convinced her that he’ll marry her after that so she needn’t worry. He might’ve pressured her into it. Or maybe she did it with her own will, you never know. Just because she slept with him doesn’t make her a playa. Maybe she was devoted to him and loved him with all her heart, and just did it to prove her love and trust in him. Just because she slept with him doesn't mean she did it with other guys.

as i understood from what engima explained above..

That it was only a one time thing and he couldn't control himself because the girl was coming onto him too strong.

so basically it was HER who lead him to sleep with her. and there wasnt really a relationship between them as far as i understood.

Originally posted by Enigma
Nabhan, bringing up the girl and whatever mistake she's done doesn't make the guy's action's justified. There's really no point in talking about the girl here.



as i said.. i takes TWO. so unlike u..who's totaly blaming the guy only.. i am blaming them both. :)

u're just being biased enigma. its very clear.

anyways.. both of them are lame... the guy and the girl. fullstop.

Originally posted by NaBHaN
as i understood from what engima explained above..



so basically it was HER who lead him to sleep with her. and there wasnt really a relationship between them as far as i understood.


Nabhan aren't you the guy who's always saying that its the GUY who has to want to start something for it to happen?

What you're saying now has caused a contradiction for that theory; and I wonder.....

Originally posted by NaBHaN
as i said.. i takes TWO. so unlike u..who's totaly blaming the guy only.. i am blaming them both. :)

u're just being biased enigma. its very clear.




I'm NOT being biased dear Nabhan. The girl was TOTALLY wrong, I acknowledge that... but some birdie had me convinced that the guy had to want something to happen for it to actually happen.

And besides that, he's going for a THIRD girl now. See how the word playa and Jerk come into phrase?

Originally posted by Enigma
Nabhan aren't you the guy who's always saying that its the GUY who has to want to start something for it to happen?

What you're saying now has caused a contradiction for that theory; and I wonder.....

some guys are too weak i guess.. just like some women are too strong.

you're smarter than this engima.. i wonder why u just wanna blame the guy..when u KNOW that its also the girls fault. at least i am being fair here and blaming both. :os

Originally posted by NaBHaN
some guys are too weak i guess.. just like some women are too strong.

you're smarter than this engima.. i wonder why u just wanna blame the guy..when u KNOW that its also the girls fault. at least i am being fair here and blaming both. :os

So basically men have no self control. I guess all of them will cheat if the girl is 'too strong' eh?

I'm not only blaming the guy Nabhan but look, he's messing with 3 different girls at the same time! He sleeps with one, tells another he loves her and is getting engaged to another!

Originally posted by Enigma


I'm not only blaming the guy Nabhan but look, he's messing with 3 different girls at the same time! He sleeps with one, tells another he loves her and is getting engaged to another!

there is no doubt at all that he is a scumbag .. but just know that Not all guys are like that , and so.. women shouldnt just assume that oh.. their guy is able to cheat on them. a woman should never doubt her husband/bf untill something happens to make her doubt him. i guess thats all i have to say about this.

women shouldnt just assume that oh.. their guy is able to cheat on them.

Well if they have no self control and no personality... :rolleyes:

Anyway, I'm with you that she shouldn't doubt him till he does something to deserve it. But thats hard because most women never see it coming.

I still hate men though. :shy:

guys are players because some girls offer the game by their stupidity and blindness...

Originally posted by Homeless
guys are players because some girls offer the game by their stupidity and blindness...

Exactly..

well said.. well said.. :app:

Originally posted by NaBHaN
Exactly..

well said.. well said.. :app:



but then guys are still a$$holes... a girl is stupd and foolish enough to trust in them .... but I guess if the girl was smart enough then she'd know how to manage such guys and situations ...

Originally posted by Homeless
guys are players because some girls offer the game by their stupidity and blindness...

If you are talking about playing for sex then yes. But if a girl is being genuine about the relationship and sincere then that's just a totally unjust statment.


a girl is stupid and foolish enough to trust in them .... but I guess if the girl was smart enough then she'd know how to manage such guys and situations ...

'Stupid and foolish enough to trust in them'; some players are masters at what they do. Its not always the girl's stupidity.

And girl's shouldn't need to MANAGE guys, what they can't manage themselves? I was gonna say you make them sound like dogs when I remembered that's what we call guys who can't manage themselves :D

Originally posted by Enigma
'Stupid and foolish enough to trust in them'; some players are masters at what they do. Its not always the girl's stupidity.

And girl's shouldn't need to MANAGE guys, why they can't manage themselves?
you are right..Why they can't manage themselves? :irk:

manage as in know how to deal with them and not sink into their lies or whtever u mean by being a master in playing!!!!!! :rolleyes: