women are asked or obligated to obey their husbands..... in other words women must obey their husbands as long as they arent asked to do things out of islam......

according to this, there's a woman who asked her sister to do something for her children to take care of them that was her will to her sister but then her husband didnt allow her to do so ... now is she mistaken for not applying the will and listen to her husband ..... or what she should do?????????????

Tough situation there..:sorry:

I am waiting to read the answers too, from Islamic point of view..

She should get her husband permission first, after all they are his children also.

Agree with IceTea!

Originally posted by IceTea
She should get her husband permission first, after all they are his children also.


what if he refuses to let her.....

Are you talking about Will, as in Waseeya, or just Verbally?!

I thought when it comes to writing a WILL, no one should really know what you wrote in it, but one has to inform where it is being kept if death Occur!!

So women have ti actually ask permiision to their husband even during writing a WILL?!

Neena, you got it wrong.

The sister wrote that when she dies, the children are to be taken care by her sister. The first sister died and now its to the sister to apply the will. However, the husband of the second sister refused to apply the will.

I think the wife should obey her husband. after all, the husband is responsible of taking care of the finances of the house. However, if the husband is refusing for no valid reason he is bearing the sin.
This is not a fatwa, just a mere opinion. wallahu a3lam!

Originally posted by nana
women are asked or obligated to obey their husbands..... in other words women must obey their husbands as long as they arent asked to do things out of islam......

according to this, there's a woman who asked her sister to do something for her children to take care of them that was her will to her sister but then her husband didnt allow her to do so ... now is she mistaken for not applying the will and listen to her husband ..... or what she should do?????????????
I think she should know the reasons behind her husband's refusal first and if they were logical enough to convince her then she should listen to him and if they were not then maybe she hmmm I donu but maybe she shouldn't listen to him as some husbands misunderstand the meaning of being a good Muslim husband and like to show their power over their wives. :bang: :6:

Originally posted by SadLad
I think she should know the reasons behind her husband's refusal first and if they were logical enough to convince her then she should listen to him and if they were not then maybe she hmmm I donu but maybe she shouldn't listen to him as some husbands misunderstand the meaning of being a good Muslim husband and like to show their power over their wives. :bang: :6:



well lets they that the husband and the sister had personal problemsssss....

AP, got the first part right .... but she doesnt have to take care of the financial part for her nephews and nieces but actually hass to do something for them like supervsing on some events....... and all financial situations are solved, in fact she doesnt even have to pay a penny, just that the husband doesnt want his wife to apply the will because he and his sister in law had problems.....

so now should she apply the will or obey her husband....???

Tough one!! i would go with what is morally right, which is taking care of the children one way or another.

You must obey your husband in everything but sin.

thanx all for your replies......


would she be panished if she listend to her husband and not apply the Will ( wa9eyah)
would she be panished if she apply it but not obey her husband....

If the wife took the decision by herself without agreeing first with her husband then that will is not valid. Becuase they are his children and he is the only responsible for them. If he agrees to apply his wife will it's ok.

Any reason his wife wrote such will?

Here we go again
Women obeying husbands like they were some kind of gods and women are the dogs
Why cant a women decided what is good for her? why should the husband be the one deciding that?
Never heard anythin more stupid than this n err never will!

Originally posted by ~*FaiThFuL*~
Here we go again
Women obeying husbands like they were some kind of gods and women are the dogs
Why cant a women decided what is good for her? why should the husband be the one deciding that?
Never heard anythin more stupid than this n err never will!

Faithful don't let your feelings and emotions take you away and say bad things, just read below verse


ÇáÑøöÌóÇáõ ÞóæøóÇãõæäó Úóáóì ÇáäøöÓóÇÁ ÈöãóÇ ÝóÖøóáó Çááøåõ ÈóÚúÖóåõãú Úóáóì ÈóÚúÖò æóÈöãóÇ ÃóäÝóÞõæÇú ãöäú ÃóãúæóÇáöåöãú ÝóÇáÕøóÇáöÍóÇÊõ ÞóÇäöÊóÇÊñ ÍóÇÝöÙóÇÊñ áøöáúÛóíúÈö ÈöãóÇ ÍóÝöÙó Çááøåõ æóÇááÇøóÊöí ÊóÎóÇÝõæäó äõÔõæÒóåõäøó ÝóÚöÙõæåõäøó æóÇåúÌõÑõæåõäøó Ýöí ÇáúãóÖóÇÌöÚö æóÇÖúÑöÈõæåõäøó ÝóÅöäú ÃóØóÚúäóßõãú ÝóáÇó ÊóÈúÛõæÇú Úóáóíúåöäøó ÓóÈöíáÇð Åöäøó Çááøåó ßóÇäó ÚóáöíøðÇ ßóÈöíÑðÇ



Men are guardians over women because ALLAH has made some of them excel others, and because men spend on them of their wealth. So virtuous women are obedient, and guard the secrets of their husbands with ALLAH's protection. And as for those on whose part you fear disobedience, admonish them and keep away from them in their beds and chastise them. Then if they obey you, seek not a way against them. Surely, ALLAH is High and Great

Mmm lemme see if I got this right..

We are saying here that A GOD, claims that men are better than women because some features god has put in them (what features are those?) and because they spend money on their women, ( so if women start spending money on themselves or on their husbands, they will become better than the husband and the husband should obey them?)
And now the Ayaa takes another turn, saying if the women doesnt obey her husband, he should have the right to hit her?
Islam doesnt allow people to hit animals, but it allows us to hit women eh? Intersting..very intersting..
Funny the way there isnt even one ayaa saying if the men doesnt protect his wife secrets or obeys her that he should be punished by her in any way..
Another things which is rather funny, is when a wife refuses tpo have sex with her husband for one night she is cursed by the angels, while there is no hadith or aya saying if the man was the one refusing to he would be cursed, instead ( and this is as I know in shiaa i dunno abt sunna) if the man stops having sex for a time limit of THREE months the wife has the right to complain to the 7akim il shr3i and get a divorce, while in the man's case for ONE night she would be cursed, or even worst he would have the right to hit her bcuz she is nshooz!
Like whatever!
where is equality in tht?

Originally posted by ~*FaiThFuL*~
Mmm lemme see if I got this right..

We are saying here that A GOD, claims that men are better than women because some features god has put in them (what features are those?) and because they spend money on their women, ( so if women start spending money on themselves or on their husbands, they will become better than the husband and the husband should obey them?)
And now the Ayaa takes another turn, saying if the women doesnt obey her husband, he should have the right to hit her?
Islam doesnt allow people to hit animals, but it allows us to hit women eh? Intersting..very intersting..
Funny the way there isnt even one ayaa saying if the men doesnt protect his wife secrets or obeys her that he should be punished by her in any way..
Another things which is rather funny, is when a wife refuses tpo have sex with her husband for one night she is cursed by the angels, while there is no hadith or aya saying if the man was the one refusing to he would be cursed, instead ( and this is as I know in shiaa i dunno abt sunna) if the man stops having sex for a time limit of THREE months the wife has the right to complain to the 7akim il shr3i and get a divorce, while in the man's case for ONE night she would be cursed, or even worst he would have the right to hit her bcuz she is nshooz!
Like whatever!
where is equality in tht?

I'm really shocked to see a muslim girl talk about Allah words (the holy Quran) and the profet "hadith" in this way and without any respect. The way you put your views as if you are not talking about your God and your profet PBUH.

Such words like :

"We are saying here that A GOD, claims that men are better than women .."

"And now the Ayaa takes another turn, saying if the women doesnt obey her husband, he should have the right to hit her?
Islam doesnt allow people to hit animals, but it allows us to hit women eh? Intersting..very intersting.."

"Another things which is rather funny .."

"Like whatever!"and where is equality in tht?

Faithful this is not the right way to talk about religion issues and address Allah rules and profet sayings :eyes:. If you have a question this is not the way to raise questions.

Please ask for forgiveness from Allah before something happend to you.!

Ice tea, did I curse or say anything un-respectful?
Check my words, not one word is unrespectful..

When I said that we are saying a god here claims...I said that because deep down in my heart I know that a god which created me can never be un-fair or un-equal to his own creation..It would destory me and my whole faith to think that my own creator is unfair...(so where is the dis-respect in that?)

About the other sentc., what was the disrespect in that? what I said was totally true, islam doesnt allow us to hit animals, how come it allows us to hit women??

and dont ya think it is funny that a women is cursed by angels if she doesnt have sex with her husband for one night or two, while he isnt, and she should wait three whole months before complaining (again notting disrespectful in the word funny)

and indeed where is the equality in all of this?

And nothing will happen to me, cuz again I dont think any god would want us (while he gave us a brain) to juss blindly follow anything without thinking
You know that is the reason why we cant think these days, whenever we start think abt a 7okom in Islam or anythin, 3ala 6ool they tell u ast'3ferallah you are kafraa how can u question god's a7kaam!
Is it wrong to think?
And it is sad, you choosed to make it seem that am being unrespectful rather than answerin my questions..
I guess you can see there is a bit of un-equality..any person can see that..that if he allowed himself to see, most of us we juss act as if we are blind

*FaiThFuL* keep your head high and keep your faith strong........

These people who take the words of the Quran and beat their chests like children.......are living in the 7th century.......

Ignore then.........because they use Islam like a weapon to secure their positions.........

It is clear in Islam to respect women......and treat as complete equals.....but the men of that time changed things to suit themselves.

A spiritual man doesn't need to have sex with 4 wives......or beat them if they disagree.

I feel sorry for women who have to live with this mentality........and thank GOD not all men have it.

salaam
fatak

Check my words, not one word is unrespectful..


You said many words not suppose to come from a muslim person. You said "we are saying here a GOD" this like you are making fun of Allah and when you said "a GOD" it's like there are many GODs!!!

Second things you said "claims that men are better than women .." How do you call Allah claims??!!! And it's like you are saying that Allah is not fair with the way he created both women and men.

Then you said "And now the Ayaa takes another turn, saying if the women doesnt obey her husband, he should have the right to hit her?" the "Ayah takes another turn" this is like you are making fun of the holy Quran your book!! And also like saying when Allah allow men to hit the women as a mean of treatment, he made a wrong decision!!!

You also said ""Another things which is rather funny .." is this not making fun of profet sayings!!, where as in the Quran muslims are requested to take what profet told us to do and leave what he instructed us to leave.

And still you say I didn't say anything un-respectful :rolleyes:


And nothing will happen to me, cuz again I dont think any god would want us (while he gave us a brain) to juss blindly follow anything without thinking

It's ok to ask but in a respected way.

Originally posted by fatak
*FaiThFuL* keep your head high and keep your faith strong........

These people who take the words of the Quran and beat their chests like children.......are living in the 7th century.......

Ignore then.........because they use Islam like a weapon to secure their positions.........

It is clear in Islam to respect women......and treat as complete equals.....but the men of that time changed things to suit themselves.

A spiritual man doesn't need to have sex with 4 wives......or beat them if they disagree.

I feel sorry for women who have to live with this mentality........and thank GOD not all men have it.

salaam
fatak

*Fatak thanks for understanding what I was trying to say, it is nice to see that there are some men around with a healthy mentality..ya made my day..
Any person with one cell in his brain can see that it isnt right to hit any person, espically women being hit by a man who is stronger physically than her..it is abuse..and how can a god who is so loving be abusive..it just doesnt make sense
and what you said abt a man doesnt need to have sex with 4 wives pr beat them if they disagree is LIKE EXTREMLY TRUE.., they make sex look awful, sex is meant to be a wonderful experince between two people who love and trust each other..how can a wife sleep with her husband by knowing that in his heart he has love for three more women? and now some one will say she should be more loving and accept 3 wives for her husband..whatever okay.. it is just not possible..

And it is sad to see that A muslim man like you Ice tea, cant be able to see all of this, you choosed to concenrtate on my words, rather than the message am trying to see
I wouldnt be surprised to see that you dont find these a7kaam against a person's nature..because they work just fine for you as a man with such a mentality..

Originally posted by ~*FaiThFuL*~
how can a wife sleep with her husband by knowing that in his heart he has love for three more women? and now some one will say she should be more loving and accept 3 wives for her husband..whatever okay.. it is just not possible..


What is wrong with that, It's one of men rights to marry more than one wife, are you standing against Allah rules??

Originally posted by ~*FaiThFuL*~

And it is sad to see that A muslim man like you Ice tea, cant be able to see all of this, you choosed to concenrtate on my words, rather than the message am trying to see
I wouldnt be surprised to see that you dont find these a7kaam against a person's nature..because they work just fine for you as a man with such a mentality..

Thats the problem dear, you used the wrong way to express your feelings and raise your questions. Remember we are talking about Islamic rules and principles and not making jokes and fun of Allah rules and profet PBUH sayings. I hope you got my point, and fatak told you to keep your faith strong and I'm saying same thing to you but strong faith means "no doubt in Allah rules and profet sunnah". Allah is fair and created men and women for a purpose in this life, each of them has goals and responsibilities.

Ice Tea..darling....when will you understand the true meaning of Quran.......and what the phophet meant by taking old widows and their children and others as wives so that they wouldn't live as lonely people when their husbands died in battle or otherwise........

You seem to like to tell women if they don't see things as you they are not good muslim girls.......that they are insulting Allah???

salaam
fatak

Originally posted by fatak
Ice Tea..darling....when will you understand the true meaning of Quran.......and what the phophet meant by taking old widows and their children and others as wives so that they wouldn't live as lonely people when their husbands died in battle or otherwise........


I think we have discussed this issue many times and we said that a man having the ability to treat two women in justic is allowed to marry another wife, 2nd, 3rd and 4th. He doesn't have to have a reason for taking this step, but if the reason is there it's also ok.

Originally posted by fatak

You seem to like to tell women if they don't see things as you they are not good muslim girls.......that they are insulting Allah???

salaam
fatak

Are you telling me when someone doubt Allah rules and make fun of the Profet sayings is an accepted behaviour?

You are in no position to judge others and their Islamic faith.......it's really an amatuer and naive position that you are taking......and hiding behind religious books makes you appear to be very insecure and without compassion for others......

Maybe you need to take Quran 101 class again.....

salaam
fatak

Originally posted by fatak
You are in no position to judge others and their Islamic faith.......it's really an amatuer and naive position that you are taking......and hiding behind religious books makes you appear to be very insecure and without compassion for others......

Maybe you need to take Quran 101 class again.....

salaam
fatak

fatak darling, don't make up things and relate them to me to deviate from the main topic. Who said I'm judging people faith? It's only you.

I'm asking you same question which you ignored:

Are you telling me when someone doubt Allah rules and make fun of the Profet sayings is an accepted behaviour?

Ice Tea why are you insisting to make things which are un-true, true?
I didnt insult allah, and it is quiet obvious that I didnt okay, and thinking about his a7kam isnt insulting, because he told us to think about it, and if you can juss blindly follow what ever u have been told then well many people cant so stop it okay...and if I did indeed insult allah then I shall be kicked out of this sabla!

Cant you for once just argue with reasons? not just by saying: well this is the way it is you have to accept it or you are a bad muslim!

Faithful, I'm not making up things and don't get me wrong, I'm just trying to advise you only as your brother in Islam.

Didn't you said "A GOD claim", Tell me do you think this ok to say like this and address your God in this way?

Didn't you said "how funny" about the profet Mohammed saying with regard to the angels cursing women when the husband requested his wife to bed and she refuse. Do you think it's ok to say how funny??

Instead of arguing you should say "Asta'3far Allah Al3a'9eem" many times.

And I'm again not saying you should worship Allah blindly as it's wrong you should worship Allah with knowledge, But you need to ask your questions in a proper way and not the way you did.

Example you can ask:

Why Allah allowed men to hit "nashiz" women as mentioned in the Quran?

Now this is ok to ask in this way and you will get the answer.

IceTeaExample you can ask:
Why Allah allowed men to hit "nashiz" women as mentioned in the Quran?

Now this is ok to ask in this way and you will get the answer.Ok......then why does Allah allow men to hit women as mentioned in the Quran?

And I don't find it funny. I find it very disturbing that any person would believe that God would even think this.

The verse that says beating women is acceptable, tells me the Quran is not the word of God, but is the word of man.

Now you people have gone off the topic toooo way........



Ice Tea , the woman who wrote the will is not the wife ....... let me put it this way...

a woman who worte the will = ameena
the wife= laila
husband= moh'd

now ameena wrote the will that laila should be the organizer ofd her( ameena' daughters) weddings.... that was in the will......because ameena doesnt have sisters or brothers..... now does ameena have to go to Mohd and ask him if she could write such a will????????????

i know it's my mistake that didnt explain .......

Originally posted by nana
Now you people have gone off the topic toooo way........



Ice Tea , the woman who wrote the will is not the wife ....... let me put it this way...

a woman who worte the will = ameena
the wife= laila
husband= moh'd

now ameena wrote the will that laila should be the organizer ofd her( ameena' daughters) weddings.... that was in the will......because ameena doesnt have sisters or brothers..... now does ameena have to go to Mohd and ask him if she could write such a will????????????

i know it's my mistake that didnt explain .......

Ok now it's different case.

Well in my opinion I still think "ameena" should corrdinate with both of them Moh'd and his wife. Why, because laila is a married woman and a married women should always get her husband permission for such critical issues. Or at least she needs to tell laila to discuss the issue with her husabnd first before taking any decision and to avoide any problems in the future.