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Read:
A young man named Murphy applied for an engineering position at an Irish firm based in Dublin. An American also applied for the same job. Both applicants had the same qualifications were asked to take a test by the Department manager.
Upon completion of the test, both men had only missed one of the questions. The manager went to Murphy and said, "Thank you for your interest, but we've decided to give the American the job."
Murphy said, "And why would you be doing that? We both got 9 questions correct. This being Ireland and me being Irish I should get the job!"
We have made our decision not on the correct answers, but on the question you missed," replied the manager.
And just how would one incorrect answer be better than the other?"
The manager said, "It's simple. The American answered 'I don't know' to question #5. You put down 'Neither do I.'"


very well AlMeskery

'Neither do i."
:p

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i read this today and thought it was funny!!!

A film crew was on location deep in the desert.One day an old Indian went up to the director and said "tomorrow rain",the next day it rained.

A wekk later the Indian went up to the director and said "tomorrow storm",the next day there was a hailstorm.

"The Indian is incredible" said the director.He told his secretary to hire the Indian to predict the weather.However,after several successful predictions.the old indian didnt show up for two weeks.

Finally the director sent for him."I have to shoot a big scene tomorrow said the director," and i am depending on you.What will the weather be like?"

The Indian shrugged his shoulders."Dont know" he said......
"Radio is broken"
:D

A boy was playing catch out in the garden with his dad. He came across a honey bee and stomped on it. At that moment his dad shouted out " No more honey for a week sonny". The game was then continued and the little boy came across a butterfly. He stomped on it instantly hearing another shout form his dad " No more butter for a week old sonny". The next day at breakfast, the boy was unjoyfully having his raw bread with no butter or honey when a cockroach crawled out of the sink. His terrified mum instantly stomped on it. " Dad" the boy said. " Are you gonna do the talking, or shall I do it ? "

hehehe.................get it ?!

[Edited by I_Maskery on 03-08-2001 at 08:54 PM]

Read:
"This is Captain Sinclair speaking. On behalf of my crew I'd like to welcome you aboard British Airways flight 602 from New York to London. We are currently flying at a height of 35,000 feet midway across the Atlantic."If you look out of the windows on the starboard side of the aircraft, you will observe that both the starboard engines are on fire."If you look out of the windows on the port side, you will observe that the port wing has fallen off."If you look down towards the Atlantic ocean, you will see a little yellow life raft with three people in it waving at you."That's me your captain, the co-pilot, and one of the air stewardesses. This is a recorded message. Have a good flight!"

i got these from a forward email enjoy'em
*****************************************
*****************************************
> TEACHER: How old were you on your last birthday? > STUDENT: Seven.
> TEACHER: How old will you be on your next birthday? > STUDENT: Nine.
> TEACHER: That's impossible.
> STUDENT: No, it isn't, Teacher. I'm eight today. >
> -------------------------------------------------------
> TEACHER: George, go to the map and find North America. > GEORGE: Here it is!
> TEACHER: Correct. Now, class, who discovered America? > CLASS: George >
> -------------------------------------------------------
> TEACHER: Willy, name one important thing
> we have today that we didn't have ten years ago. > WILLY: Me! >
> -------------------------------------------------------
> SUBSTITUTE TEACHER: Are you chewing gum? > BILLY: No, I'm Billy Anderson. >
> -------------------------------------------------------
> TEACHER: Didn't you promise to behave? > STUDENT: Yes, Sir.
> TEACHER: And didn't I promise to punish you if you > didn't?
> STUDENT: Yes, Sir, but since I broke my promise, I
> don't expect you to keep yours
> -------------------------------------------------------
> TEACHER: Tommy, why do you always get so dirty?
> TOMMY: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground then you > are. > >
> -------------------------------------------------------
> HAROLD:Teacher, would you punish me for something I > didn't do?
> TEACHER: Of course not. > HAROLD: Good, because I didn't do my homework. >
> -------------------------------------------------------
> TEACHER: Why are you late? > WEBSTER: Because of the sign.
> TEACHER: What sign? > WEBSTER: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow." >
> -------------------------------------------------------
> TEACHER: I hope I didn't see you looking at Don's > paper.
> JOHN: I hope you didn't either. >
> -------------------------------------------------------
> GARY: I don't think I deserve a zero on this test.
> TEACHER: I agree, but it's the lowest mark I can give > you. >
> ------------------------------------------------------- >
> MOTHER: Why did you get such a low mark on that test?
> JUNIOR: Because of absence.
> MOTHER: You mean you were absent on the day of the > test?
> JUNIOR: No, but the kid who sits next to me was. >
> -------------------------------------------------------
> SILVIA: Dad, can you write in the dark?
> FATHER: I think so. What do you want me to write?
> SYLVIA: Your name on this report card. >
> -------------------------------------------------------
> TEACHER: Well, at least there's one thing I can say > about your son.
> FATHER: What's that? > TEACHER: With grades like these, he couldn't be
> cheating. > > -------------------------------------------------------
> TEACHER: In this box, I have a 10-foot snake.
> SAMMY: You can't fool me, Teacher...snakes don't have > feet. >
> ------------------------------------------------------- > HYGIENE
> TEACHER: How can you prevent diseases caused by > biting insects?
> JOSE: Don't bite any. >
> -------------------------------------------------------
> TEACHER: Ellen, give me a sentence starting with "I". > ELLEN: I is...
> TEACHER: No, Ellen. Always say, "I am."
> ELLEN: All right... "I am the ninth letter of the > alphabet." >
> -------------------------------------------------------
> TEACHER:Max, use "defeat," "defense," and"detail" in a > sentence.
> MAX: The rabbit cut across the field, and defeat went
> over defense before detail. >
> -------------------------------------------------------
> MOTHER: Why on earth did you swallow the money I gave > you?
> JUNIOR : You said it was my lunch money. >
> -------------------------------------------------------
> TEACHER: If you received $10 from 10 people, what > would you get?
> SASHA: A new bike. >
> -------------------------------------------------------
> TEACHER: If you had one dollar and you asked your
> father for another, how many dollars would you have? > VINCENT: One dollar.
> TEACHER(sadly): You don't know your arithmetic.
> VINCENT(sadly): You don't know my father. >
> -------------------------------------------------------
> TEACHER: If I had seven oranges in one hand and eight
> oranges in the other, what would I have? > CLASS COMEDIAN: Big hands! >
> -------------------------------------------------------
> BOY: Isn't the principal a dummy! > GIRL: Say, do you know who I am?
> BOY: No. > GIRL: I'm the principal's daughter.
> BOY: And do you know who I am? > GIRL: No. > BOY: Thank goodness! > > :-)

http://www.geocities.com/honey2die4u/bosh.jpg

Nice one....

Men:
1. Drive to the bank, park, go to the Cash Dispenser.
2. Insert card.
3. Dial code and desired amount.
4. Take the cash, the card and the slip.

Women:
1. Drive to the bank.
2. Engine stalled.
3. Check make-up in the mirror.
4. Apply perfume.
5. Manually check haircut.
6. Park the car - failure.
7. Park the car - failure.
8. Park the car - Success.
9. Search for the card in the handbag.
10. Insert card, rejected by the machine.
11. Throw phone card back in handbag.
12. Look for bankcard.
13. Insert Card.
14. Look for Tampon Box (where secret code written) in Handbag.
15. Enter code.
16. Study instructions for 2 minutes.
17. #Cancel#
18. Re-enter code.
19. #Cancel#
20. Call husband to get correct code.
21. Enter desired amount.
22. #Error#
23. Enter bigger amount.
24. #Error#
25. Enter maximum amount.
26. Cross fingers.
27. Take cash.
28. Go back to the car.
29. Check make up in rear mi
Hope You Like It ....

[Edited by some1 on 03-28-2001 at 09:21 PM]

Read:
Patient (to cosmetic surgeon): Will it hurt me, doctor?
Surgeon: Only when you get my bill, Mrs. Brown

nice one SoMe-1 :D

welcome to the sabla Costafruit

ok here is one...

competiton: use 3 colors pink,green and yellow to form a sentence.
American: i woke up and it was a pink morning(meaning beautiful morning),drove to work in my green car arrived at work and my secretary was wearing a yellow dress.

Indian:**Actually,i woke up by the sound of my pink telephone ringing "Greeen Greeen" i picked up and i said "yellow"

** note u have to say the sentence using an indian accent to get it..

i apologise to any indian reading this joke ..

[Edited by 4-ever-young on 03-30-2001 at 04:01 AM]

Cheap Boyfriend !!
(sorry guys)

After being away on business, Time thought that it would to nice bring his wife a little gift."How about perfume?" he asked the cosmetics clerk. She showed him a $50.00 bottle.

"That's a bit much" said Tim,so she returned with a smaller bottle for $30.00."That's still quite a bit" Tim complained.

Growing annoyed,the clerk brought out a tiny $15.00 bottle.
"What i mean" said Tim "is i'd like to see something really cheap"

The clerk handed him a mirror!!

A husband,proving to his wife that women talk more then men, showed her a study which indiciated that men use about 15,000 words a day,whereas women use 30,000 words a day.

she thought about this,then told her husband that women use twice as many words as man becuase they have to repeat everything they say. Looking stunned,he said,"what?".

LOL :D

Dear 4-ever-young i guess you got that a bit wrong..
the indian joke is more like..

Indian:**Actually,i woke up in the morrning i hear my phone "Green'g' Green'g' Green'g'" i "Pink" up the phone and i say "Yellow".. :p
:)

hey thnx some1 but that is the one i heard...
so i guess it works both ways ...doesnt mean that mine is worng justdifferent!! ;)

http://www.freetreemedia.com/files/3/03-13-01.jpg