does anyone go to their dean for help and expect a sexual response from him? well thats what happened to me when i visited my dean in his office. i really thought i can trust him because theres no one above him at school. so one day when i went to his office for a problem at school he started to get close to me. he put his hands around me and kissed me. i was shocked and i didn't know what to do. how dare he get that close to an omani women.

i dont know where this will lead to be i cant get over it and i wasn't the only one he did this to. many of us thought that he was just a touchy person, but when privately he does something like this he is terribly wrong and he has no write to ever come close to any women like this.

i dont wish to cause any threat to his family but i wish and my other friends wish him to stop before he get into trouble. we are releaved that he won't be the dean at mcbs anymore.

now im scared to trust and know better not to trust some people just because of their status.

Thats why the quran states that each of the sexes be seperated to stop this sort of horrible behaviour. teachers and principles should be of the same sex only,then no one can take advantage.
You should tell someone,I know you don't want to upset his family,but if he gets away with this sort of behaviour who says how far he will go one day??????
wish you luck!

is this in Oman????????????????????????
how proposterous !

even if not in oman...u should immediately report him. Clearly he is unfit to be a dean of anything, not even his foot !
We are talking about ppl who are supposed to set good examples to their students, what we have here is a total jerk. I say u report the guy. End of story. If not, then, make sure other colleagues are aware of his doings.

I know its embarrassing to talk about this infront of ppl, cos then u might end up being blamed. But really, he can't stay where he is. Its only doing more harm.

C, these are one of the disadvatages of being in a mixed society. But then i heard of even more terrible stories in girls schools.

truth, dear,


if u dont mind

i have not understood this 'dean'

did u mean 'man' or headof school

or what.

please reply me, i think we might find an excellent solution
without harrasing or causing any family problem.

thanks to: traeauk,r.online,& salim,

its impossible to sepearate men & women. this world was made for both to share but then God has given us a brain to know right from wrong and principles to follow. unfortunately, this school dean of MCBS is taking advantage of his female students, he has no principles!

this man now is his excelency and now is in the ministry of social affairs.i came at the wrong time and if i only knew earlier of this man was doing the same to other women i definetly would have stopped him. but i thought i was the only one, so i shut up.

what to do now? the only thing i thought of doing is at least informing others through internet. at least i can openly admit to his wrong doings. but if their are any other suggestions please help me stop this man. he shouldn't get away with this!!

Asalaam aleykum


truth, dear,


First let me congratulate u for yr political way of trying to solve this problem.


Wel, to this extent I think the first step is try to talk with dear paretns, especially
First , mam, (u know mothers and daughters/sons relations of course)

Then after (of course) long discusdsion, and before deciding to take any action, then u
Can raise a Proposal, that neither u nor them to follow this matter.


As we are lucky members to be within this Sablah, and Sablah is Sablah, for discussion, and then take our views to the leaders (Sheikh)


So that proposal of yrs is to try and get contact with Mr Saeed (the starter of this sablah) and explain to him in details, and let the matter with him.


That is why I said before as “ that We could help u”

Now am sure as mr saeed has managed to bring us together and to this extent while,
(Before if such a problem happens then there comes the ..haterage and enemity.)

so by his wise and kind hand, i/we hope we shall all be more than happy to hear good news, as well to strengthen our English Sablah AS real SABLAH.

Hii Alll
dear truth,
next thing to do is to say to his wife i think his wife comes sometimes to the college as far as i know isn't it....plzzzzzz don't hasitiate to tell her and i'm sure she will do somethig...don't tell her out loud just personally and then i think things will be ok......i know this person very well and i hate him..i hate to say that i hate him cuz we don't have to hate each other...other thing is this person studed in USA and he thinks that the college is like USA,......Don't worry my friend as i told you go and speak to his wife or anyone from his familly i think someone in his familly has a position in office i don't know if you know the lady if you don't know her e-mail me and i will tell you her name ok :)

HAVE A NICE DAY :)

What a shocking behavior by so called DEAN or head of college!!!

Act instantly by telling your parents about this incident and any other incidents that happened to your collogues. I think your dad or old brother will definitely take the matter seriously as it should was taken from the first time the guy touched you. Telling his wife is not a wise solution at this stage because it will only make things more complicated.

heh, don't take it easy at all !!

thanx to miss smiler & nzwani,

miss smiler you said that you hate hime why is that so?? did he do anything to you or someone close to you? why do you think i should tell his wife? im afraid that she might go against me, or she might not believe me. what then?

again thanx for your responses!

truth
yes i know this person very well and i know his bad behaviour and i cannot say more then that.......his wife is sooo kind and i think she will not be against you cuz hios wife knows his follish behaviour i gusse so......other thing as i told you if you don't want to tell his wife you can speak to the lady that i told you about...i know that one of his relative work in the college and if you want her name i can tell you....(e-mail me if you want her name) i'm sure 98% that this lady will do something about it if not speak to your father or brother or sisters or MOTHER.....
...i know its harde for you to say to your parents or brothers cuz then everyone will belame you not him....so nzwani wasn't right when he asked you to go immidiatly to tell your familly about it
GOOD LUCK MY FRIEND AND I HOPE THAT EVERYTHING WILL GO FINE....JUST SPEAK TO the lady that i told you about or to his wife...if you don't know the lady e-mail me and then i will tell you who is she ok

HAVE A NICE DAY!!!!!!!!

well I don’t know this guy in person so I could be mistaken in my suggestions but..

Why do you think I am wrong??? heh girls if you don't trust and feel confident with your family then you got a big problem!!
You said that his wife could be aware of what's going on so why should truth just waste her time?? or why should she contact a woman she doesn't even Know!! Wallah tarik Swalif ya smiller !!

Truth is not confident enough to speak to his wife?? so she shouldn’t do that at all, and she also shouldn’t contact the woman that you guided her to because she simply doesn't know her. (unless this woman hold a higher position in the school).
PrinceSsNaj, I am still thinking that truth must speak to her family before its too late and I have the feeling that they will not blame her for situation she had no chance to control.

Truth a question to yoou & a suggestion:

1) What was your problem you had to discuss with the dean?
2) How well do you know him?
3) People have these tendences especially in the Arab world to be 'touchy feely' etc. Do you think perhaps you & the other girls mis-undestood his behavior & perhaps he was comforting you with your problem.
4) Word of advice never get inbetween married couples - you can oly cause harm for the family & to yourself.

So, I think if you have a problem with him you should be mature enough to approach the dean himself and express your feelings to him and I am sure this way you will feel alot better...

nzwaaaanii
its not trust or confidint...sure suppose everyone feel that to their familly but this is a big thing and you know i think the familly either will ask her "why did u go to his office alone or why u didn't take some girls with you"..the familly might not ask that...they might say "why you didn't tell us when it happen" or they will ask "why you didn't do something".....and then after all that the belam will be on us the girls....its worth to try...

the lady that i said about she has a big position(but not biger then him of course)....and this man i know him personally and i can understand truth cuz me too i don't like what his doing to girls.....
truth if you feel that you cannot speak to his wife or any of his family fair enough....its better you to decide who to talk to and who u feel that would help....you have to talk ....cuz i talked and no one listen to me what i'm doing now avoiding him

GOOD LUCK MY FRIEND... :)

my dear friends,

first to you miss.smiler: your so sure that if i speak to his wife or relative things or at least 98% gaurantee that everything will be fine. so then why didn't any one listen to you then!!?? it's like you have the right answers but for you it didn't work out, why? how many of your friends were harrassed by him? what did they do about it? why if i tell his wife, then it will be o.k. by the way what is your email? i know his wife and i know his relative, wish me LUCK!

next kenzo: your questions were of most unrelative!
1)what do students usually have to dicuss with their dean other than school!!!!! (what deferense!)
2)whether i know him 1 min or 10 years!!!!!(what deferense!)
3)give me a break women&men in arab countries?where?africa?
4)didn't he think of that before he touches!!!(again, what derferense!)

sorry kenzo, your questions did not make any deferense to me for him to have any right to HARRASS me not even in the USA!
my next step is to write in the SABALAH.

when i said "i talked and noe one listen to me" i meant by that i said to someone about it and he replay to me that he treat me as i'm his young sister(ya right, might be)...and the person that i spoke to he went and spoke to him in front of me i was embaraced and then he was loughing..maybe the situation will be not same with you..i cannot tell you why...
when you planning to speak to his wife tell her that you don't like the way he react with you and other girls doesn't like it..find your way and i'm sure everything will be fine
i knew that someone will ask you the same question as kenzo ask you which was
"What was your problem you had to discuss with the dean?"
GOOD LUCK MY FRIEND AND I HOPE THAT EVERYTHING WITH YOU WILL GO FINE....
P.s, i wish to tell you my e-mail adress but i cann't in public i thought that you could get it from some where here??

HAVE A NICE TIME

this is a Q to kenzo.

U said something along these lines that
"in an arab country ppl get touchy /feely..maybe he didn't mean it"

i say:
where r u living? touchy feely? anaw ba3adny

A few years ago in SQU, a british lecturer(male) was discussing to his student (female) and noticed she was wearing a gold bracelet & pendent that he liked.
Being a european, he didn't see the harm to examine the object while she was wearing it. The girl was shocked (being a reserved omani girl) and reported him immediately.

The guy was sacked. In a way, it was unfair, maybe not..i don't know, thats not the issue here...but if this guy got the boot for just touching the pendent she was wearing, then surely, the guy in this college who did the touchy feely action should not be booted once, but many times.
I think he should be reported to the proper ppl. Not his wife..nor anyone from his family.

IF we want to bring up proper students we must have proper teachers first.

test

Hi Every one

I am reading most the topics without replying , but I couldn't with this one !!!!! :(

Truth ,, Dear sister
I was really sorry to know that this happened to you and I was more upset that we can't do any thing for you this time. :(
Believe me if this thing happened to one of my relatives I prephere she would tell me rather than keeping it for her self.
However,I hoped that I was in Oman so I could teach your dean a lesson in my way :(
My advice to you is to find good member in your family who could help you without blaming you to get red of this problem and I prepher if this person is an educated man.
Trust me I am very angry because this happened to one of my sisters in Islam and in my country and I am not helping her. :(

Try not to think about this problem alot because deep thinking bring pshycological diseases and it was good thing to write about your problem here and share it, because that will give you some relieve ,,, So please just pray and read quran and ask Mighty Allah to make you forget this matter.

I hope for you the best ( Allah with you Sister ) :)

I hope this will not happen to any one.

If you are still not happy , You can ask me to kill this dean for you but after two years , because I will be in Oman after two years ( if I am still a live ). ;)

Your Brother in Islam ...............

Truth,

I understand your situation and I see what you have been through, but what got you in that situation in the first place.
Does this dean know you enough and why did you let him get that close to you in the first place???

You all seem to accuse this Dean without asking about the facts as to what happened.

My question is why did you let him get that close in the first place? And if you felt uncomfortable with it in the first place then why did you not mention it??
Please I do not need the same replies you have given KAnza or some other person in the Sablah.

It does make a difference as to why you did not say anything and have used the Sablah as a last place to show your pain and anger.????!!

I would be too ashamed to discuss such an issue with total strangers in the Sablah and would rather have dealt with it on my own. Things like this happen all the time but it just so happened to you. Thus, you should have taken the actions necessary on your own and not put them on the Sablah. Tell me what have you got from embarrassing yourself and the college???
Advice????? One person is telling you one thing and the other person is telling you another........ Who would you listen to???!?!?!

I know that I am coming down hard on you, but to me this issue should have stayed with you and if you had needed to talk to ppl about it then you could have been more discreet about it. You did not have to mention the college and other personal things that were said.
What have you gained??

If you really want a solution then find one for yourself and deal with it on your own because no one could come and tell you as to what has to be done.
If you come to tell your parents then the issue would be blow out of proportion and if you come to tell 'the woman in the college in the English Dept.' then the issue would also be blow-up and the worse thing you could do is talk to him wife.

If this has happened to you and many other girls then tell there girls to face up to him and if you have no one to do this with them go one your own. BE BRAVE & STAND UP TO YOUR RIGHT as a student as a girl and most of all as a woman.

Wishing you the best 'Truth' and hope that you are able to face-up to your problem.


Wardat-il'7leej

i guess i would agree with wardat al-'7aleej on that.. there was no need to menstion the college or the dean you could have been more like talking in general. you got to face the dean and talk to him.. and the worst you could do is talk to he's wife.. all the best..
P.S : wardat al-'7leej welcome back sister.. hope to see more of your posts around..

Sure i can trust the dean of my college.

One thing that i really love in this country is how everything gets blown out of proportion, especially by mindless arses like you.

Dr. ****** ** ******* is a very smart man, who is more than qualified to take hold his position (have you seen how many degrees he has?)

You should be ashamed of what you have written about him, all for <html><head><h2>FOR A HUG</h2></head></html> which is what really happened.

You not going to MCBS must have been a great relief to the students and the staff.

And tell me, if he's not qualified to hold this position then, by all means, tell me who is?

You are worst person.

Oh yeah, and if you to comment, try not to blow my comments out of proportions please.

worst.



[Edited by I_Maskery on 04-19-2001 at 11:18 AM]

I really felt sorry for you, the minute I read the message. If you were asking whether the damn dean was right or wrong, I would certainly say that he was mistaken from his head to his legs. If I were you, I would hit him right away on his face the minute he started touching me. Listen my friends, these matters have to be reached to your family, no one can stand beside you right now, and who's going to if not your family. It will be very difficult for sure to try and solve it with your friends, especially if he's accuping the highest position in the college. Well, he's done the same to your friends too, hasn't he?
It means he is a bad guy and needs to be cicked out of that place, they say raising well before education....finally, I want to say you should never be silence for stuff like this, cooperate with your friends and do something, you can change it as long as you have the courage..

WHAT A SHAME 2U GANDULF,
IT SEEMS YOU HAVE A BIG PROBLEM YOURSELF WHEN YOU JUDGE A PERSON BY HOW MANY AWARDS HANG OVER HIS HEAD. YOU NEED TO EDUCATE YOURSELF A BIT AND NO ONE CAN JUDGE A BOOK BY ITS COVER. IT YOU CAN UNDERSTAND THIS. SORRY! SO I ASUME ALL POLICE MEN, PRESIDENTS, GOVERNMENT OFFICALS, DOCTORS, LAWYERS, BUSINESSMEN, DEANS, AND CAKE DECORATORS ARE PEOPLE YOU CAN TRUST 100%? I THINK YOU GET THE POINT HOPEFULLY!

WHY ARE WE THE VICTIMS WHEN HE INTENTIONALLY HUGGED, TOUCHED & YOU'VE FORGOTTEN KISSED MANY OTHERS? THIS IS OUR FAULT AND NOW WE DON'T BELONG TO SOCIETY. SORRY AGAIN BUT THERE IS SOMETHING DEFINETLY WRONG WITH YOU! UNLESS YOU ARE JUST DEFENDING HIM AND DENYING THE FACTS!

SEE IT A SHAME TO PEOPLE LIKE YOU WHO GO ONE ADMIRING OTHERS AND IMITATING OTHERS JUST BECAUSE YOU THINK ITS COOL, EVEN IF THAT PERSON IS DOING WRONG BUT YOU WONT SEE IT BECAUSE YOUR TO NARROW MINDED! AND BECAUSE OF THINKING LIKE YOU I TRUSTED THIS PERSON AND HE TOOK ADVANTAGE.

BUT ITS OK LIFE ONE DAY WILL TEACH YOU GANDULF AND YOUR DAY WILL COME.

i am sorry that you had to go through this truth, but what i really want to know is what did u do about it? did u contact his wife? or did u go and talk to him about it? or did u stay quiet about it and left it for the members of the sablah to jugdy!

did u get any benift by posting this topic? did u realy need to mention his name or where he works? i suggest that u should go to him and put a stop to what he is doing right now, so that it wouldn't happen to anyone else! and i doute that it ever happed...

were u a student in that college? are u still a student in the college? if u are so confertable taking about this in a public board, then what were you talking with her that made him do such a thing?

I know sis truth that u have been going throught alot ( if it is true) .. nothing is more hurting than being used ..
However, it is not appropriate to mention his post here ina public fourm .. if u wanted to report him you could have went to somewhere where u can be heared and somthing could be done about it .. for example .. gather the girls who u think were used by him and go to the police sation .. I am sure if there was a big number of girls complaining or even if it was u with your family, police will take an action .. keep trying .. there is no harm in trying .. but posting his post and his name was mentioned later is not right .. since u have no proof he did that and it will only spoil his reputation if he did not do it or will make people not go to teh collage and he will not get any actual punishment ..
I say go to your family and solve this thing out ..
I wish everybody before taking any action they should care about the circumstances ..

well Mrs truth, I'm sorry to tell u that u're talking RUBBISH...
I'm a female like u, a student at MCBS and I know the Dean and hes a very good perosn, he never tried to do anything to me and I never heard anyone talks about him the way u did.
if its true that he has done such a thing to u or any other girl, those girls would have talked to each others about it and i would absoluetly heard that, but i heard nothing, nothing AT ALL.
if u had this problem u would have talked to anyone about it. but as kamakazy said u just posted it here, did u gain anything by posting this topic here?? did u gain anything by mentioning a very clean name in public????? u didnt I'm sure.
so never say such UNtrue things again plz.