I know this question might sound silly to some members...and perhaps narrow minded to some others...

however, I do think its a subject thats worth discussing.. and I'd like to see your opinions..

First to understand the aim of the question, try to view the topic from our Socitey's perspective..


How do people in our society look upon girls who chat with non-relative guys?


Is such a girl considered off track? or maybe "cheap", easy going and not well raised by her parents?

or is it fine as long as she knows her limits (mu7tarama) and doesnt say anything wrong?



Again, try to look at the question from our society's point of view and answer accordingly.. (even if you disagree with our society's rules and norms you can mention that and explain why)..

I do not see why u need to give justifications Bimi . u r right in raising this issue .. it is very popular attitud and almost happening all over the country ..

now.. what i think of it ? . it depends on her maturity and the opposit part .. in which both is to be asked ( Boy and Girl ) what is their aim of chating .. is it to catch a partener or is it for discussing things with the opposit part ... the judgment of such practice depends on what kind of chating is going on.

as the role maybe applied on all ( halalu'h halal wa harama'h haram)

let us hear from other who may have different background hence different views

Nice Thread Bimzori.
I as well Think it depends on the maturaty of the both side..what are their aims..
by Bimzori...How do people in our society look upon girls who chat with non-relative guys?
Are you excluding the oppsite gender Relative!
Cause i think if you will include cousins with the relatives then it will sure be considered under the same case! Cause anything what can happen out of a non-relative will be considered under the unme7ram relative!
Well to talk about myself..I have alot of non-relative contactors..I have some of my proffesors,cousins,freinds who i refer to every after time and time family etc etc etc..
...the bottom line is like what they say*inama ala3malu biniyat* in my opinion it all depends on self will and how people practice it..:o

Originally posted by Bimzoori

How do people in our society look upon girls who chat with non-relative guys?

OFCOURSE she is cheap when she goes chatting with him, and one day when he sees her out and he says "hi", then she goes on saying "Huh, I don't know you" and moves.

Originally posted by Bimzoori
How do people in our society look upon girls who chat with non-relative guys?


Is such a girl considered off track? or maybe "cheap", easy going and not well raised by her parents?

Though I am not an Omani, as I still live in "your" society, I believe I can give also my opinion.

There are two types of chats...1) chatting which simply means talking casually and face to face with the opposite gender...or 2) chatting indirectly via telecommunication systems like the internet or the phone.

On either case, it depends what are the intentions of each party. If there is no bad intentions, I personally do not see any harm in it. I will not judge a girl "cheap" because she talks to someone who is not related to her, if the conversation is genuinely "clean". I will judge her "cheap" when she starts talking dirty to a man and this whether it is one of her relatives, her friend or an acquaintance.

Though upbringing influences a girls behaviour, I still believe that as she grows she develops her own personality and make her own choices which has nothing to do with how well or not her parents raised her.

And for last, "chatting is chatting" and I do not believe that it is safer for a girl to do it with a relative, than it is to do it with a male acquaintance. At the end, they are both men and will look at her at the same angle if they want to...;)

Our society looks to this matter as a bad behaviour !!

But ,,why would a girl talk to a non relative guy ?
I don't see any reason make her do so ,,unless he's collegue ! an that should be takin place in the collegue ,,univ ,,or whatever they are in !!

What do you think ,,the girl who chats with guy thinks of herself ,,? do you think she feels she's doing something wrong ?!!(usually with phone chat)

If so ,then she would try to hide this ,,which means that even the girl is not convinced of what she is doing !!and she knows deep down she is doing something wrong ,,or at least not acceptable by her society .

About chatting with non ma7ram relative is the same as chatting with non relative ! i strongly disagree with this , coz the relative guy will be much concerned about the girl and her repution !

They are both men ,,tht's true ,,but looking at her with the same angle if their intention is ..!! that's not true ,,of course the reltive guy will think million time b4 intending to do such thing !!

Last one from me :
Not accepted in our society ,,that's fair ,,but is it wrong ?!!!

Bim Could u plz clear one thing out,,,,
Do u mean Online chatting ,, or face to face and phone chat?

Depends ....depends....

What kind of guys is she chosing to chat with? If she's chatting with some jerk that talks stupid/dirty then yeah I'd probably look down on her. Even if she's not the one who's talking dirty but is listening (reading?) then.....well..... :rolleyes:
Also like some of you have already said it depends on the content of the chat.

But if it's all clean with a good guy, then no harm done. :)

About society, we all know how close minded it is. I don't need to elaborate. :rolleyes:

I wonder....... why couldn't we ask : How do people in our society look upon guys who chat with non-relative girls? ;)

Thanx all for your contributions..

They are both men ,,tht's true ,,but looking at her with the same angle if their intention is ..!! that's not true ,,of course the reltive guy will think million time b4 intending to do such thing !!

I agree with you Navigator here.. to give an example: a guy would tell you he wouldnt like it if his sister chats with someoen, whereas you find him chatting with other girls.. arent these girls your sisters in Islam?? why dont you protect them just as you would protect your sisters???


Originally posted by runnin' around


I wonder....... why couldn't we ask : How do people in our society look upon guys who chat with non-relative girls? ;)


I would guess you already know the answer to this ;) it might sound unfair.. but thats the way our society has evolved, and we've got to live with it.. thast what we're taught since we're young: any harm to your reputation would harm the family name.. and any simple scratch to your reputation could ruin your future.. and so on...

Originally posted by Chocolate
Bim Could u plz clear one thing out,,,,
Do u mean Online chatting ,, or face to face and phone chat?


Miss Choco.. I am mainly talking about online chatting here.. because it became the most common way of communication between males/females in our society's new generation, since the other methods are not acceptible..

Originally posted by samy
now.. what i think of it ? . it depends on her maturity and the opposit part .. in which both is to be asked ( Boy and Girl ) what is their aim of chating .. is it to catch a partener or is it for discussing things with the opposit part ... the judgment of such practice depends on what kind of chating is going on.

brother, what if we assume that most chatting sessions are not to discuss serious matters ( I mean really serious matters).. ya3ni.. just as you would chat with your friend: how are you, how are things going on with you.. what have you done.. what are you upto and so on..

would you stilll look down on the girl/guy even if both are known to be respectable and well-raised?? but my main focus here is on the girl.. because if there was any harm happening from this, then the girl would definitely be the most party being harmed..

Originally posted by Don Khaled
OFCOURSE she is cheap when she goes chatting with him, and one day when he sees her out and he says "hi", then she goes on saying "Huh, I don't know you" and moves.

are you saying she's cheap because she agreed to chat with you in the first place, or because she ignored you?

Alot of good answers been posted already..:)

How do people in our society look upon girls who chat with non-relative guys?

In general the older generation mostly wouldn't accept the concept. But the new generations would be more accepting to it. Thats based on how familiar they are to such concept.

Online chats....thats quite new .....been few years..only....but used widely....does everyone in the society understand it..or know how it works.. NO....soo we can easily exclude those from it. The ones who are aware of it. Would either totally accept it or deny it. Based on their own experiences.

So, overall it should be considered from the persons' own opinion which based on his/her surroundings and how much awareness is avaliable.

-----------------

Is such a girl considered off track? or maybe "cheap", easy going and not well raised by her parents?

hmm, NO? why would she be :) As long as she respects herself, aware of what she is doing, able to select the people she chats with and sets her own limits (red lines), which shall not exceed then that makes it simply ...fine. ...But in another hand that totally depends on how she was raised. Not everyone is raised the same and not everyone share the same concepts about how to look at things.

Overall if she respect herself then its fine. If she can control the flow of chat then its fine. And above all if she can make the other side respect her then she has nothing to worry about.

---------------------------

or is it fine as long as she knows her limits (mu7tarama) and doesnt say anything wrong?

Exactly...

---------------------

hmm.... I would personally consider this issue for both genders.....True a girls reputation is more looked at in this society, but a guys' reputation is as important.

If I allow myself to chat with the other gender, and deny that on my sister, then i would be lying to myself. I personally introduced the internet and showed what is chat about to my sister.

I and her have been raised by the same parents. I know my limits...so naturally I would trust her as i trust myself in this.

its all about logical thinking. As long as u know what you doing...you know your freedom boundries....clearily see your limits and give respect to the other person. Then....once again..its simple.....such way of communication is just fine..:)

hmmm last point.....thats considered for regular or serious chats.....you cant be always regular and same as serious ...both will interact. So its all about respect. :D

Originally posted by Don Khaled
OFCOURSE she is cheap when she goes chatting with him, and one day when he sees her out and he says "hi", then she goes on saying "Huh, I don't know you" and moves.

I would quite disagree with you here. She has all rights to totally ignore him. Being online " friends ", doesnt mean they are friends offline too... :rolleyes:

Online they are actually Mind friends in the first place. And Bimmis' got a good question there...waiting to see your reply to it.. :)

Well i think if the case is only onlione chatting i dont think that its very complicated, the topics are withing the limits.

Personaly my parents knew that i had online male friends from all over the world , even Gibralta!!! and they didnt mind. But they would still tell me whats right and wrong, just to remind me where my limits are.

As for the society they dont have to know what i do in my parents home and with thier guidence.

Originally posted by Bimzoori
I know this question might sound silly to some members...and perhaps narrow minded to some others...

however, I do think its a subject thats worth discussing.. and I'd like to see your opinions..

First to understand the aim of the question, try to view the topic from our Socitey's perspective..


How do people in our society look upon girls who chat with non-relative guys?


Is such a girl considered off track? or maybe "cheap", easy going and not well raised by her parents?

or is it fine as long as she knows her limits (mu7tarama) and doesnt say anything wrong?



Again, try to look at the question from our society's point of view and answer accordingly.. (even if you disagree with our society's rules and norms you can mention that and explain why)..

Ok, how do I put this politely enough so as not to offend anyone's sensibilities???

Oh for pete's sake, will you all just stop for a second and listen to yourselves??? When did Muslims (irrespective of cultural background) become so judgemental and ..well...JUDGEMENTAL????

Firstly, how would you know who is chatting with 'non-relative guys' unless you were backbiting or prying which are both UN-ISLAMIC BEHAVIOURS?

Secondly, who are you exactly to deem others, whatever they are doing as 'cheap,and easy' or to make a judgement on the way someone was raised by her parents??? ISNT IT ONLY OUR CREATOR'S ROLE TO JUDGE US?
Since when have humans been authorised to make such judgements, especially when you obviously could not know the contents of the chats, nor the intentions behind them, unless you were a sicko who has nothing better to do than spy on the private chats of others, or a mind-reader who knows what lies in the hearts of others. WOW if you are!!! Care to share how you got so **** clever?

Thirdly, WHY THE HELL IS THIS ONLY ABOUT GIRLS FCOL??? Dont tell me that's how your society works and resign yourself to submission. If you dont make a stand to change your own society's condition then who the hell will???? Stop with the double standards already. Its 2003.

Now go do something productive, like self-analysis and self-improvement. We are all guilty of sin and are all riddled with some fault or shortcomings, which should leave absolutely no time for hypocritical discourse such as this.

hmm ..what are you on about raffee...:)

such topic might not be consider serious else..where...i guess thats why Bimmi made sure to point to our society in particular... it is quite an issue.

hmm.... would like to know your opinion about the topic instead of questioning it...if possible... isnt that the idea of discussion.

:duh: Was I just talking to myself then?

I do not see u was talking to ur self .. u was attacking Bimi in a very awful way .... one has to look at ur words and try to figure out why u responded so badly at her .... maybe we can come out with a conclusion of ur sick mentality ....:mad:

she raised an issue for discussion / she mentioned in a very clear way { OUR SOCIETY} and not urs ..

How dare u talking to her this way ???

please u either answer according to the question query or do not show us how brave u r .. one can be hero behind the desk while in reality he/she is deeply cowered..

Bad day in the office Samy???:rolleyes: Oh beg your pardon, I mean in the nuthouse!

Take a chill pill buddy! I wasnt attacking anyone, but merely stating my own point of view, based on an Islamic perspective ok, so keep your nasty narrow-minded comments to yourself. They are not necessary.

raffee: no u werent talking to yourself..but you kinda didnt reply to the actual topic..though your opinion is highly respected.

samy: .....i think you've totally mis-understood ...raffee there...she wasnt attacking Bimmi...nor anyone...she was giving her opinion about the idea of the thread thats basically it.... she has the right to do that.....and thats why i asked her in my previous post if she wants to tell us what she thinks about the idea of the topic, itself not the topic.

soo cool it.....:rolleyes: .... i am quite sure you dont know her that well..to be blaming her on like that... and its you now who is attacking...

sooo lets stick to the topic..please....

Originally posted by samy
I do not see u was talking to ur self .. u was attacking Bimi in a very awful way .... one has to look at ur words and try to figure out why u responded so badly at her .... maybe we can come out with a conclusion of ur sick mentality ....:mad:

she raised an issue for discussion / she mentioned in a very clear way { OUR SOCIETY} and not urs ..

How dare u talking to her this way ???

please u either answer according to the question query or do not show us how brave u r .. one can be hero behind the desk while in reality he/she is deeply cowered..

Thought I had best quote you in case your conscience got the better of you and you decided to edit.

I really cant believe how low people will stoop when their security blankets are shaken a little.

walhee u made me lough ... i am low ... hahahahah..
well anyway .. u r the best one to know what is the word low mean .

take it easy .. u was so upset when Bimi touch the truth .. so u responded without deep thinking and a little politics / diplomacy .. that is why the truth came out of ur mouth..

i am sorry if i had to shake u a little .. .. security blanket .. that is a good one ...

anyway D.D. is saying u did not direct ur reply to Bimi .. he maybe right .. but u did direct ur lovely words towards me .

again when u want to respond to any threads .. leave ur background mentality a way for a while .. beleive me u will touch the truth in all
shaloooom raffee

hmm ok ..seems this is carrying on.......

samy...she replied to YOUR...post..and your replying to her....i urge both of u to stop this moment..plz...and if you have any problems with each other report to the Moderator of this Sabla....

I am not going to comment anymore ..to either of u'r posts. ...totally dirifting from the topic....and mostly a big misunderstanding...

soooooooooooooo

back to the topic plz...

Originally posted by samy

again when u want to respond to any threads .. leave ur background mentality a way for a while .. beleive me u will touch the truth in all
shaloooom raffee

samy, raffee's mentality is not only refreshing but all of us should start thinking like her. What's wrong with someone who speaks their mind openly, states their opinion? Why should we hide? Your contradicting yourself, first you call her a coward then you say we should hide our mentalities when we respond to a thread? Who is hiding now?

I totaly agree with raf's opinoin (and I'm NOT showing favourtisim here either!) in fact she said exactly what I did just in a different fashion. A little energy in posts won't kill anyone. :rolleyes:

u showed really important poinst raffee, but the topic was made just to know the opinion of peaple about a specific issue, its not really like JUDGING them!

Now let me try to get back to the original subject,,,
According to my experiance, and taking what I saw in my own eyes into account, I think chatting with non-relative girls is VERY DENGOROUS!!! I've really seen enough to say that!!
even a (mo7taramah) girl can be affected.

BUT, I think if chatting was with girls from other countries (especially non-arabs) may be good!! I think topics in this case will be much more serios and there will be nothing like "dating" or something like that. The same thing applies for girls!!
Its not like because arabic-girls think defferentlly or anything like that, but I really dont care much weather its a boy or a girl who's im chatting with if (he or she) lives far away!! Thats my point of view!!



:rolleyes: :rolleyes:

Raffee says:Secondly, who are you exactly to deem others, whatever they are doing as 'cheap,and easy' or to make a judgement on the way someone was raised by her parents??? ISNT IT ONLY OUR CREATOR'S ROLE TO JUDGE US?

Allah judges our deeds according intentions..true.. but people DO judge our actions and often IGNORE or MISUNDERSTAND our intentions.. see how dangerous THAT can be?? see why I'm trying to be carefull about it??




Raffee says:Stop with the double standards already. Its 2003.


whether its 2003 or 3002, do you think it would be right for our society to open up and allow foreign values to intrude upon our conservative society turning it to what we see happening in the West?

If this is what we are saying today.. I wonder what will happen in the coming generations.. I am already starting to worry about what teh situation will be like as my younger siblings are growing up in an environment that is opening up to western values each day...

Its good to be open minded..but not if this open mindedness would transgress the limits of your society norms...

Desert Destroyer says:Overall if she respect herself then its fine. If she can control the flow of chat then its fine. And above all if she can make the other side respect her then she has nothing to worry about.



WHat you have mentioned above sounds good and reasonable.

BUT, is that how the majority sees it?

Ok, how about an explanation for this:

Many of the guys who chat wouldnt like to see their female members of the family chatting with foreign males..

One explanation I have in mind for this is that when these guys chat with girls, they build up a not very pleasant image about this girl who has agreed to chat with him..


guys is this true wala la?

Originally posted by raffee
Dont tell me that's how your society works and resign yourself to submission. If you dont make a stand to change your own society's condition then who the hell will???? Stop with the double standards already. Its 2003.


Now that's the woman I imagine Raffee to be !

OFCOURSE she is cheap when she goes chatting with him, and one day when he sees her out and he says "hi", then she goes on saying "Huh, I don't know you" and moves.

oh please spare me!!! just cause a girl chats with guys on the net doesnt make her a Wh*re !!! i see nothing wrong with anyone..male or female..talking to anyone..even on the street..let alone chat on the net!!

that's the problem in our society!! they tend to make a big deal out of nothing..why dont you lock her up in cuffs?? that's what's left!

Bimzoori said:
Many of the guys who chat wouldnt like to see their female members of the family chatting with foreign males..

One explanation I have in mind for this is that when these guys chat with girls, they build up a not very pleasant image about this girl who has agreed to chat with him..


guys is this true wala la?


Very true!!....now thats the double standards Raffee was talking about.....we cant say its ok for guys and not for girls...the thing is ...such guys have bad intentions..or would come to know randomly a girl with bad intentions...

So your right Bimzoori...if a guy acts like this then what you mentioned is quite right. And that is what we will limitation...of mind... ~ narrow mindness ~. Judging people on experience...or on other external factors....isnt the case..and should be the case.

:angre: OH MY GOD!!!!! YOU GUYS THINK THAT A GIRL IS CHEAP IF SHE CHATS WITH A MALE WHO IS NOT FROM HER FAMILY ???????
MY GOODNESS!
THAT MUST MEAN IM A REALLY REALLY "CHEAP" YOUNG LADY!!!!

THANKS GUYS FOR THE INDIRECT REMARKS!
:sorry:

Originally posted by Morbid_Angel69
:angre: OH MY GOD!!!!! YOU GUYS THINK THAT A GIRL IS CHEAP IF SHE CHATS WITH A MALE WHO IS NOT FROM HER FAMILY ???????
MY GOODNESS!
THAT MUST MEAN IM A REALLY REALLY "CHEAP" YOUNG LADY!!!!

THANKS GUYS FOR THE INDIRECT REMARKS!
:sorry:

hey ,,everybody is telling his opinions,frpm the society point of view ,,so what others see wrong might be right and vice virsa !!

so don't be offended ,,coz you are not the only one doing this in here !!

BUT, is that how the majority sees it?

Ok, how about an explanation for this:

Many of the guys who chat wouldnt like to see their female members of the family chatting with foreign males..

i dont really mind if any of the female members of my family chats with guys!! even if it was my sister..cause i TRUST THEM to do the right thing!!


One explanation I have in mind for this is that when these guys chat with girls, they build up a not very pleasant image about this girl who has agreed to chat with him..
guys is this true wala la?

i personally dont care about all the society crap that happens here..and i dont care about what ppl say about the girls who chat!! cause no matter what you do ..good or bad.. they're gonna talk about you and say things which you wont like!! people should live their life based on what they believe in.. what makes them happy and satisfied!! not what satisfies the people of the society!!

Originally posted by Morbid_Angel69
:angre: OH MY GOD!!!!! YOU GUYS THINK THAT A GIRL IS CHEAP IF SHE CHATS WITH A MALE WHO IS NOT FROM HER FAMILY ???????
MY GOODNESS!
THAT MUST MEAN IM A REALLY REALLY "CHEAP" YOUNG LADY!!!!

THANKS GUYS FOR THE INDIRECT REMARKS!
:sorry:

Girl as long as you know what you are doing, then let people say what they want. TUZ feehum.
I've read in so many islamic internet sites in the past that there is nothing wrong with it. And as long as you aren't hurting your religion then just forget about society and people's remarks.


Boy, I loved that. You rock! :wink:

Girl as long as you know what you are doing, then let people say what they want. TUZ feehum.

nice point man, I liked it :cool: :cool: :cool:

Funny how the opinions of locals are given far more respect and authority, even if they are in contradiction to the majority.:rolleyes:

I dont see samy tearing RA, Boy, or MA69 up yet their views are almost identical to mine.

Very sad really. You are only pushing people away with your bigoted, prejudiced ways.

:fire: The word "CHEAP" is a little harsh dont you think? Cheap has connotations of being a "****". sorry for the word usage here but im trying to make a point.
How about rewording what you initially stated and say that "Is females chatting with males from outside the family, haram or hilal?" In this way people wont be posting things saying that it makes a girl CHEAP - meaning she is "easy" for guys to get a hold of! Because this is just insulting the female gender whether we are chatting for the wrong or right reasons.
:angre: I mean it would sound alot better if you said something like "i dont agree with that because in our society its haram..blah blah" but that fact that some people in here are GENERALIZING saying that :fire: ALL GIRLS WHO CHAT WITH MEN OUTSIDE THEIR FAMILY must be CHEAP!!! That is wrong! wallah!:sorry:

I did now want to discuss the issue from a Religious point of view, thats why I placed it in here..so I am not asking whether its halal or haram.. I want to know if its an acceptable thing by peopel in our society or not, because I would usually try to conform with society rules...

You think the word "cheap" was a bit harsh.. I agree with you.. however, people who are so against the idea of chatting might consider it cheap.. and thats what I wanna know...

If you ask about my opinion: if people or if the person I'm chatting with are going to underestimate my up-bringing and my morals merely because of chatting, then I would not go for it.. simply because I do care about the concept of "reputation".

I might seem "backward" and "narrow minded" to some people.. right?! :D but at the end of the day everyone is entiteled to do what they feel comfortable doing..

(many people say I give alot of attention to issues that arent really worth it, and make things seem more complicated than they really are :duh: I wonder if this is one of them..)

:confused:
No, what i was trying to say is that the word "cheap" is exceedingly harsh and since oman is a society where most of the locals or should i say ALL of the locals are muslim, it would have made more sense to look at it from a religious point of you.
Otherwise there are going to be people misunderstanding and alot of the female members of this sabla will be insulted - because we do chat with males outside of our family but does this actually make us "CHEAP"!? :lost: Can we generalize and say that "girls who chat to males outside of their family must be cheap?". I mean there is nothing wrong with chatting and learning about new cultures and religions - and seeing peoples different opinions. This is all part of experience and we are living in the year 2003 now where you cant expect girls to avoid getting on the computer - otherwise she will be denoted as CHEAP.
wallah it makes no sense! Where is the logic??:confused:

Bimmy I think it is an important topic.

When I started using the internet, I was still new to its envirometn. I thought that as I trust and respect my self, everyone will actually do!! I started searching the net and went to a website where it had a guest book. I was so excited and said that I would like to make friends with others. I had put an abbrivation of my name, thinking it was normal. The next thing I see is a list of e-mail from GUYS which were not proper.
My point, even if you think one way, not everyone would think the the same way so a girl should be careful who she is talking to in the first place.

I did not stop chatting with guys, but I learnt to choose who I chat with. Because, yes so cheap mentality guys think that girls who they chat with are cheap but not everyone !! Some guys respect the girl he is chatting with and infact with respect her privacy maybe more than she herself do!!

I dont see samy tearing RA, Boy, or MA69 up yet their views are almost identical to mine.
Rafee, samy was not trying to be aginst your opinion, but I think he was refering to the method you used to give your point of view which could have been harsh on bimmy. Any way the case is over now, lers concentrate on the topic :)

Originally posted by DeSerTDesTroYeR
Overall if she respect herself then its fine. If she can control the flow of chat then its fine. And above all if she can make the other side respect her then she has nothing to worry about.

Not sure that anyone read my first post here, but again I do agree with what Dede said above.

Bimmi, beside being "private", can you tell me what is the difference between replying to a male member post here in a respectable way as you do....and replying to the same person via a chat room with the same respect?

If to your opinion one is wrong, shouldn't the second be wrong too?

Exxy I understand your point that there is actally no or little differnece, but bimmy is talkinng about the preception of people. Some guys think that when they are in a chat conversation with a girl, he is allowed to say and think any way they want .. just because she allowed him to talk to her .. thats wrong, but they do think that way!

Originally posted by Bimzoori


How do people in our society look upon girls who chat with non-relative guys?



It depends on her objectives from chatting, if she wants to make a boy friend kind of relations then shoudn't do it because it's against the Islamic principles. Another thing she needs to make sure what is she doing is not against her parents will, if she knows that her parents won't be happy about what is she doing then better to avoide it to avoide any problems that may arise as a result of chatting. Girls reputation is important and one black spot in her white reputation could affect her life.

Another question is there any difference between chatting and talking directly in the phone to a strange man ? both are a method of communication and the relation first starts wilh chatting then using web cam. then phone calls and it's known that girls easy affected by men words espacially if the person she is chatting with is smart he can convince her and drag her to talk to him and listen to his demands.

Originally posted by IceTea
Another question is there any difference between chatting and talking directly in the phone to a strange man ? both are a method of communication and the relation first starts wilh chatting then using web cam. then phone calls and it's known that girls easy affected by men words espacially if the person she is chatting with is smart he can convince her and drag her to talk to him and listen to his demands.


Hahahahahaha. Is that why in the "Add a member to your MSN list" thread you asked all female members to add you? Or is it Halal for Sheikh Shai Sulaimani only?

:eyes:

Mimosa, Ice Tea was merly stating his opinion, there is no need to relate other topics to each other.

Well, I dont agree with you ice tea .. many girls chat and it stops just there .. and other do chat and they are the ones who offer to give thier numbers. It all depends on how she is well she was raised. I dont think that chatting is like any other communication method. In chatting, you just see words and you have no idea of any of the senses of the person. Yes you are exposed to his mind and thoughts but I guess could be done through a book for example!!! should we say that girls shouldnt read books written by guys?? thats impossible!!!
I beleive teh key point of wether the girl should chat or not is how she is behaving and also the consent of her family. I agree that some family members dont liek it and they might just creat problems for her because she is chatting even if she is not doing anything wrong!

One extra point, I think MSN helped to clean the idea of chatting. You normally choose who you have online which is a good screening method.

Originally posted by Arabian Princess


Rafee, samy was not trying to be aginst your opinion, but I think he was refering to the method you used to give your point of view which could have been harsh on bimmy. Any way the case is over now, lers concentrate on the topic :)


Arby, did you actually read what Samy said??? Im surprised he didnt get a warning. He was more than insulting in his remarks, and Im offended that no mod actually reprimanded him. I think I am beginning to understand Orion's views in his thread about what we love about this sabla. Talk about bias!!!

Moreover Arby, my post was not targeting bimmi, but was merely a reflection of my own views, and was targeted to all readers. Even bimmi undersood that!

Rafee, while reading your comments on teh topic I was suprised why were you attacking bimmy, maybe I did not understand your way .. but it was quite harsh they way you put it especially that bimmy said it clearly that she is talking about the way society is thinking. This is why I understand samy's reaction.
You were offended from what samy has said? what exactly offended you? if it was a guninen offence I am sure moderators would take actions. I was not biased of you are refering to me, I am just explaning what I understod and I am sorry if I misunderstod you but I cant just issue a warning without understanding what was offensive!!

'ure sick mentality'

'How dare u talking to her this way ??? '

'do not show us how brave u r .. one can be hero behind the desk while in reality he/she is deeply cowered..'

' u r the best one to know what is the word low mean '.

'u responded without deep thinking and a little politics / diplomacy .. that is why the truth came out of ur mouth..'

'leave ur background mentality a way for a while .. beleive me u will touch the truth in all'

'shaloooom raffee'


Is that not enough insult???? Read it again and you tell me!

Thanx A.P. for ur understanding ...

again raffee if u r chosing my words ... well what about urs

" THINGS ARE COMING FROM LOW POEPLE " ...

ANYWAY .. my reply was to u based on ur replies ..

i am sorry if u felt bad about it ... but i did not feel bad about ur replies to me ... Fair enough

raffee there is no need to disturbe other members about your personal feelings from other members posts. If you have any complains you can report to the moderator of this sabla and let's stick to the topic.

Icey, do me a favour will you? Pretend Im not here. I dont want you to address any of your ***************** comments to me.

stick to the topic and I will leave u dear.

I love you too iceblock!:D

Members, please stick to teh topic and if you all have any personal problems please deal with them privatly!!!

now:
Back to the topic!!!

Yes, please back to the topic!

Originally posted by IceTea
Another thing she needs to make sure what is she doing is not against her parents will,...

Icy,...when it comes to small issues like talking or not to a person, wouldn't you agree that there is a time in a girl's life when she becomes an adult and should make her own decision whether it pleases her parents or not?

I am sure most of us would like to keep a certain respect, if not for others, for ourselves first.